Save Yourself
by leobrat
Summary: Could you save yourself, for someone who could love you for you? LuluCruz
1. Chapter 1

**Word Count:** 1909

**Author's Notes:** This begins between Christmas and New Year's 2006. All the crap, I mean stuff with Maxie and Jason never happened. Elizabeth and Lucky are happily married and expecting their baby.

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

"Ooh, looks like the golden boy's playing hooky!" Cruz Rodriguez laughed out loud as his partner turned on his heel when he called him out. Lucky Spencer grinned wryly at him.

"Ducking out a little early for lunch, partner," Lucky said, walking back towards him. "I'm going to pick up something to eat at Kelly's, bring it over to the hospital for Elizabeth. You think you can cover for me for an hour or so?"

"Yeah buddy, I'll be here," Cruz smiled. He had to admit, sometimes he envied Lucky's position as a family man, for all the guys on the force teased him about it. "Hey, how was your Christmas? Did Cam like that toy that you called _forty-seven_ malls looking for?"

"Oh yeah, he just loved it," Lucky said, and Cruz couldn't help it. It was almost embarrassingly adorable how much Detective Spencer loved that little boy.

"And that beautiful wife of yours? How's she doing...With the baby?" Lucky's wife, Elizabeth, was four months pregnant- and according to Lucky, worked too hard.

Lucky shrugged. "She's doing okay. Just needs to take it easy. What about you, Rodriguez? When are you going to find a woman, settle down?"

Cruz rolled his eyes. "So how's that wife of yours again?"

Lucky laughed. "Okay, old man, but you can't avoid it forever. I'll be back in a while."

"All right, see you, man," Cruz waved as he headed back to his desk, flipping through the file in his hands.

Lulu crouched between two cars as from across the street she watched her brother leave the PCPD. She'd casually spoken to Elizabeth on the phone earlier- she knew that Lucky was getting sandwiches at Kelly's and they were having lunch together. She had at least an hour before he'd be back at the station. All she had to do was sneak in without getting caught by Mac or any other cop who knew her (which was...all of them), make her way down to the records room (in the basement where she'd pass a given thirty cops and other personnel along the way), pick the lock (which should take no time at all, provided it hadn't been changed since the last time she was down there- which was years ago), find the file on Rick Webber's case (which for a four year old file...could be anywhere), and sneak back out. Without anyone seeing her.

No sweat.

Lulu took a deep breath and kissed the ring she had worn around her neck since her Aunt Bobbie gave it to her. "You're going to have to help me out a little on this one, Mom." She popped up when she saw that there wasn't anyone hanging out in front of the door. It was too cold today.

She peeked left, and then right, and then made a run for it across the street. There was a side door that would cut about thirty feet of open hallway space- she only had to pass under Mac's office windows. But it was worth the risk, and she was happy to see that his back was turned as she ran by. The door was always unlocked- people used it for cigarette breaks- so she slipped in, and dashed down the stairs, to her left.

So far, it had all been almost too easy- but she wasn't about to look a gift horse in the mouth. At the bottom of the stairs, the hallway leading to the records room was empty, but it all depended on how quickly she could get the lock opened- and she couldn't exactly break it, or people would know someone had been in there. Readying the bobby pin she brought with her, Lulu whispered to herself. "You are Luke Spencer's daughter. You've known how to pick a lock since before you could speak. Don't screw this up now, Lesley Lu!"

This floor was creaky- so she tiptoed as quickly as she could down the hallway, and made quick work of the lock. The PCPD was still using ancient keylocks for the doors instead of swipe access cards. "Score, Spencer," she whispered to herself, slipping inside.

"...So, I think I want to compare this to that prostitution ring case we had in the Asian District last spring," Mac said to Cruz. They were looking over files for some recent suspicious activity at a strip club near the waterfront. Cruz sighed. He knew Mac was going about it the right way, the by-the-book way, but if they were going to be honest with themselves, they knew that every road led back to Sonny Corinthos and Jason Morgan. Everyone knew that they ran everything down by the waterfront, from the nightclubs to the newspaper stands. Still, there was procedure to go by. In the two years he'd been on the force, there had been umpteen ways to bring the local mob up on charges, and whatever hotshot lawyer of the moment (including their own assistant district attorney) had always been able to clear them. Mac called out to his outer office, "Kathy, can you run down to records and pull the file number..." He quickly pulled it up on his computer. "Oh-two-seven-three-six-five?"

"You know what Commissioner, I'll go get it," Cruz said, getting up. "I'm gonna grab a drink at the vending machine anyway."

"Okay, thanks, Rodriguez," Mac said, still distracted by the different reports spread out on his desk.

As he began to head down the hallway, Cruz noticed that something was off. Getting closer to the door of the records room, he saw that the door was ajar. With a silence and agility that would have made his academy instructors damn proud, Cruz drew his gun and pushed the door open, nearly dropping his loaded firearm when he saw the criminal mastermind that had managed to break into the police station records room without anyone noticing.

Her back was turned to him, but there was no mistaking that golden waterfall of hair anywhere. It belonged to Lulu Spencer, his partner's kid sister. She was rifling through a huge stack of files, with more files spread around her on different cabinets- it seemed she had been there for a while.

"What do you think you're doing?"

She jumped about a mile in the air, losing some of her papers in the process. "I'm, uh...I'm just..."

Cruz shook his head at her grasping for an excuse to be snooping in the records room, not even wanting to entertain how she had picked the lock. "You're just leaving, Little Spencer, that's what you're doing." He took her elbow in his hand, and started hustling her towards the door, but she gathered up whatever gumption she had in her and jerked herself out of his grasp.

"I'm going to do whatever it takes to prove that my mother's innocent, and you can't stop me."

He wanted to laugh in her face, but the stubborn determination in her expression stopped him. "Your mother- what are you talking about?"

She lowered her voice to a whisper, though he wasn't sure why. She was already caught. "Four years ago, my mother went into a...catatonic state because she had supposedly killed her stepfather," Cruz nodded. It had been hard to watch Lucky go through the recent heartbreak of getting his mother back and losing her again. Lulu took a deep breath and continued. "Before my mother...Before she faded again, she told me that she was _sure_ she was innocent, and by God, I'm going to prove it and-"

"And I can't stop you," Cruz finished for her. He glanced down between them, and saw she was still grasping the one file for dear life, and he'd bet that it was Rick Webber's file. He was familiar with the case- everyone on the force was. It was part of the town's lore. But this was a dangerous path the little girl was taking, and he knew Lucky would have his head if he didn't do anything to stop her. "Lulu," he looked her in the eye. "You know what you're doing is a felony, right?"

She gulped. "Look...It's not like I'm stealing evidence or anything, or I'm going to change anything, I just want to see what you guys had so far. So I'd have a starting point. I wasn't even going to take it with me." Damn, those eyes. She had eyes like one of those Disney cartoons, all wide and innocent- but Cruz knew when he was being conned.

"_Give me the file, Little Spencer_," he said, holding his hand out for her to return the file. Reluctantly, she slapped it into his palm. "Your brother's a cop, Lulu, you know how it is. You know I can't just let you walk out of here with that." She nodded, and almost looked like she accepted the defeat- almost. "Look, just get out of here, I won't say anything to Lucky, and you'll just...forget all about this, okay? Talk to your brother, maybe he can help you out- the iright/i way."

"No, I don't want to worry him, he's got too much on his mind with Elizabeth, and Cam, and the baby," Lulu said.

"Well, maybe Nikolas can help you out- hire a private detective or something. A _licensed_ private detective," Cruz smiled at her. He didn't mean to be harsh- but this little girl was only going to get herself into trouble with the way she was going about this. "Come on, I'll walk you out."

He led her up to the side door on the first floor- she seemed to know it well, he noted. He would have to get on the guys to remember to lock it from now on. "Look, Little Spencer, I know it's hard for you. And I know you want to help your mom, but there's a right way and wrong way, you know?" She nodded, her eyes downcast, and he almost caved in and ran back down to let her have the file

"See you later, Cruz," she smiled a little sadly, and Cruz couldn't help but grin back. His partner's baby sister was sure going to break a lot of hearts some day.

Lulu waited until she was all the way home before she grabbed the sheet of paper out of her pocket. Maybe the trip to the police station hadn't been a total success, but she hadn't walked away completely empty-handed. She eyed the mugshot warily. Frank Boudreauz. He'd had dealings with Rick Webber, and apparently had owed him money for years. It didn't say anything on what he did, or where he was now, but at least that was something.

"Well, there's no better place to start than at the beginning," Lulu said to herself, booting up her computer and opening her web browser to Google. It was amazing how easy it was to find out where a person lived or what they did for a living. "Ah, a gentleman," she noted, seeing that he managed a strip club- the Oasis- on the waterfront. She clicked on the...establishment's website, and was greeted by some charming poses of half-naked women, none of whom looked particularly excited or happy to be photographed. She further searched for hours of operation, and was given her first real lead. She sat back and smiled to herself. "So, amateur night it is then, Mr. Boudreauz. New Year's Eve."


	2. Chapter 2

**Word Count: **3208

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_Done so many things wrong_

_I don't know if I can do right_

Lulu had been pacing under the streetlight near the Oasis for almost five whole minutes. She was half-worried that if a cop drove by, she would get picked up for street-walking. She certainly looked the part, in a pleated plaid skirt she hadn't worn since the eighth grade and a tiny white tank top with straps too thin to wear a bra. Completing the outfit was the discount heels she had bought that day. They were black, open-toed patten-leather with five inch heels. All in all, she looked like some bad schoolgirl porno. Yeah, she could definitely get picked up for street-walking. Or, whatever friendly officer on duty in the red light district would just call her brother.

Could she really go through with this? "All you got to do is talk to him, Lesley Lu," she said to herself. Make that a crazy street-walker. "Ask Frank Boudreauz what he knows about Rick Webber. You'll be in and out in twenty minutes." She shivered. She was freezing, but bringing a coat with her would have been too much hassle. Who knew if a place like the Oasis had a coatcheck? The cab driver on the way over had certainly gotten a show, as Lulu squirmed in her seat, trying to pull her skirt down and her top up, all without revealing too much of her mid-drift. It seemed no matter what she did, a generous expanse of hip and tummy was going to show.

"Get a grip, Lesley Lu," she said to herself. "Whatever it takes, right?" With a deep breath, she squared her shoulders and marched into the Oasis.

Cruz took a long, slow swallow of the warm beer he had been nursing for the past two hours. Drinking on the job wasn't encouraged, but when you were working undercover, you had to act the part. And that meant dressing down in jeans, a tee shirt and leather jacket instead of the usual sport coat he wore (the guys had teased him when he left the station, calling him 'Jason Ramon Morgan') and sipping the crap beer they swilled at the Oasis. Over the week, he, Mac and a few other detectives had gotten leads that the Oasis was hiring underage dancers, and they were hoping to bust them that night. Amateur Night on New Year's Eve would mean that the alcohol would be flowing more freely than usual, and the personnel would be especially lax on checking id's.

"I feel like a pervert," Terry Fraser, Cruz's partner for the night muttered under his breath. "Half of these girls look young enough to be my daughter."

Cruz grunted in reply. He felt like a damn pervert himself. There were six strategically placed detectives around the room, all trying to get one of the scantily clad girls to slip and reveal their real age. There wasn't one in the room that was any older than nineteen or twenty, with the vast majority looking more like they belonged in high school. What was even more disturbing was the men in the room who _weren't _cops. They were either blind to these girls' ages or they didn't care- Cruz wanted to smash in every single one of their stupid, disgusting faces. And none more than the club's overweight, sleezy-looking manager, Frank Boudreauz. Mr. Boudreauz had a fresh-faced looking teenager on either side of him, and was greedily counting out tips right on the table in front of the entire club. "_Cerdo la mierda_", he muttered to no one in particular.

Cruz surveyed the room. Fraser was sitting at the bar next to him, trying to sweet talk the pig-tailed bartender, but what they really needed was the dancers. Bartenders and shot girls could be explained away as 'waitresses', but if they were really going to catch this scumbag, one of the girls on-stage had to admit her age. And all the officers had to be sure that they didn't partake in any of the...services the club had to offer. Not that any of them would, but they had to be especially careful that what they were doing wouldn't be seen as entrapment. He sighed. The whole night could very well be a waste of time.

Scanning the room again, his gaze stopped on the door opening to another way-too-young blond entering. The smoke and haze cleared to reveal...The very last person Cruz thought-or hoped- to see that night.

"You're about third up to get on stage. Tips are turned into Mr. Boudreauz and he splits them in the end of the night between the girls. Did you bring your own music?" The enormous bouncer at the door asked boredly, checking Lulu up and down. His face remained indifferent and Lulu didn't know if she had passed whatever test he was giving her. She also noticed that no mention was made of checking her i.d.

"Oh, um...I was wondering..." Lulu stuttered. She hadn't danced in front of anyone- ever- and she certainly hadn't been prepared to dance while taking her clothes off. "I...I really just wanted to talk to Mr. Boudreauz."

The bouncer raised one thick eyebrow. "Talk? What do you mean, talk?"

Lulu held her hands tightly behind her back when she realized they were shaking. "I...I don't want to dance, I just need to talk-"

"Look, sweetie, if you're not here to dance, then Mr. Boudreauz has no use for you."

"I..." Lulu glanced around the club, looking for the man she had seen in his google photos, but she couldn't make out any of the faces through the thick fog of smoke in the dark club. She _refused_ to turn back at this point.

"Dante, what seems to be the problem here?" Lulu heard a low, guttural voice, and looked up to see the man she vaguely recognized as Frank Boudreauz, though it seemed his online photos hadn't nearly done justice to the man standing in front of her. Frank Boudreauz was a hulking giant of a man, with a belly that tumbled far out over his belt and a face that almost looked like a road map of the United States, there were so many broken capillaries winding across it. He leered down at her and smiled. "Well, hello, blondie, is there anything I can do for you?"

Lulu sucked in a breath and forced herself to smile brightly. "Well, yes, Mr. Boudreauz, is it?" At his flattered nod, she continued. "I have something _very_ important to talk to you about, is there any place...private we can go?" She swallowed hard. She knew she was playing with fire, but she needed information this man had- right now, he was her only lead. _Whatever it takes_, she chanted to herself in her head, like a mantra.

Mr. Boudreauz grinned widely, and Lulu had never known that a smile could be so frightening. "Of course, dear. Right this way," he offered her his arm as if they were about to promenade the ballroom and now Lulu realized she had never known that chivalry could be so frightening. Gingerly laying her hand on his arm, she followed him up to one of the booths in the back of the club and he invited her to sit next to him. She sat as far away as she could, and crouched down to avoid his fat arm curling over the booth behind her. "So, what can I do for you, blondie?"

Lulu tried to smile brightly. "Well...I need to ask you about someone you knew a long time ago. Does the name Rick Webber ring a bell?"

Boudreauz's eyebrows shot up in surprise. "That's a name I haven't heard in ages. I was pretty sure he died some years back. What does a sweet thing like you want to know about a guy like him?"

But before Lulu could answer him- and dammit, she hadn't even thought of an answer that would seem logical and wouldn't reveal the actual truth- there was a loud commotion on the stage as the current dancer finished her set, with catcalls and whistles. The MC joined her on the stage, and he gave Mr. Boudreauz a run for the money in the sleazy department. "Well, that was our own lovely little Violet, can you give her a hand, fellas? Now it's next to continue with the Oasis' New Year's Eve Amateur Fest, are there any sexy ladies out there who want to have a party tonight?" A few shy giggles could be heard throughout the room, but no immediate takers.

"So, how about it, blondie?" Lulu gulped as Boudreauz eyed her intently, his gaze lingering on her cleavage, and Lulu felt goosebumps run all over body.

"M-me?" Lulu had never stuttered in her life, but taking her clothes off? She didn't know if she could go through with_ that_.

"Yeah," Boudreauz leaned closer to her, and Lulu tried not to grimace when she smelled the stale alcohol on his breath. "How about you go have a little fun on stage, and then maybe I'll tell you a story about Rick Webber."

Lulu swallowed, her heart racing. _Whatever it takes._ She nodded. Boudreauz grinned.

"Hey, I think I have a live one over here!" he called, helping her up by yanking her out of the booth and roughly shoving her towards the stage.

Lulu almost passed out as she made her way to the stage on wobbly feet. The opening strains of The Who's "Teenage Wasteland" were blasting out of the speakers, and she was sure she felt people slap at her ass as she passed by them, but no sound or feeling registered other than the pounding of her heart in her ears. She climbed the stairs to the stage, the light hit her full in the face, robbing her of her vision, and Lulu froze.

Cruz had just about spat his drink all over the bar when he saw Lulu Spencer enter the Oasis, looking like some pedophile's dream. What the _hell_ was she doing there? Cruz didn't have any concrete idea, but he knew that it had something to do with that file she had stolen out of the records room. He glanced at his fellow officers, seeing if anyone else recognized her, but they all seemed to be wrapped up in their various marks around the room, and the new girl wasn't catching their attention.

Cruz just about pole vaulted across the room when he saw Frank Boudreauz swagger over to the entrance, eying Little Spencer up and down, and practically drooling onto her soft breasts, which were practically spilling out of that tiny tank top she was wearing. They went over to Boudreauz's private booth in the back, and Cruz craned his neck to see what was going on. She was crouched away from him, and though no part of her was visibly shaking, Cruz saw a flicker of fear pass through her big blue eyes. He knew that no Spencer ever showed fear- and that little flicker meant that she was terrified.

He was just about to blow all of their cover, setting back this case that they had been working on for months, when Little Spencer surprised him all over again, by rising from Boudreauz's booth, and making her way over to the stage. Every eye in the room was on her luscious figure, following her long, tanned legs, the sway of her shapely hips. As she took her stance on stage, time seemed to freeze for Cruz. Lulu was standing stock still, the light hitting her in just a way that made that ridiculous scrap of a top translucent and he- and every single pervert in that room- could almost see her rosy nipples, and Cruz swallowed hard. Her face held a tantalizing mix of sensuality and innocence. He couldn't tear his eyes away, and for a moment, Little Lulu wasn't just Little Spencer any more, or his partner's kid sister. She was every fantasy he had ever had, and just looking at her, just in that moment, his heart stopped.

And then she moved. Swaying her hips, slowly, teasingly, gazing out at the crowd, and Cruz felt she was looking right at him- and right through him, all at the same time. Slowly, languidly, she reached up a hand to her tank top and so damn excruciatingly slowly, she began to drag that strap down...

And Cruz knew that no matter what happened, no matter if the case was blown, no matter if he was suspended, no matter if Lucky Spencer kicked his ass for even seeing whatever he had of Lulu's bare skin, he could not let her expose herself to this filthy room any more than she had. He ran for the stage, reaching out a hand to stop her from going any further, and then-

"EVERYBODY FREEZE! PCPD!" Cruz almost breathed a sigh of relief when he heard Fraser's shout, because he knew that someone in the room had gotten the information they had came for that night. The officers around the room were grabbing the Oasis personnel, including Frank Boudreauz, and putting some in handcuffs, reading Miranda rights. Some of the girls were crying, probably because they thought they would get in trouble. The house lights came up and Cruz looked into Lulu Spencer's eyes.

And she was surprised as _hell. _"Cruz?" she squeaked out.

"Yeah, yeah, don't you _Cruz _me," he said, quickly stripping off his jacket and throwing it over her shoulders. It covered her all the way down to her mid-thigh, and when she held it closed, it looked like she was naked underneath. He pushed that thought out of his head and grabbed her by the elbow, leading her over to the side door of the club. "Get out of here before anyone else recognizes you. This door leads to an alley, I'm parked there, the black Honda accord. The keys are in my right pocket. Go straight to my car and lock the doors, I'll be out in twenty minutes."

Cruz hustled her right out the side door and watched while she made her way over to his car. He hadn't noticed before how she had wobbled in her heels.

She was silent in the car as he drove back to the 'safe part' of Port Charles. "What the hell were you _thinking_, Little Spencer?"

She was still shivering, even though she was wrapped up in his coat and the heat was blasting. He guessed that her chattering teeth had more to do with her nerves being shot than with actual body heat. "I...I needed to talk to him...ab-about..."

He groaned to himself. "Tell me one thing: does this have anything to do with that file you _borrowed _from the records room the other day?" She didn't answer, and he needed to get this straightened out before he dropped her off. If saving Lulu Spencer from herself was going to be a weekly occurrence, he needed to try to get through to her. At the PCPD, he had clearly underestimated her determination. They were across the town from Kelley's, but he knew of another twenty-four hour coffee shop on the next block. She looked up at him when he parked. "Come on. I'll buy you a hot chocolate."

She scrunched up her nose. "Do I look like a kid?"

He chose not to answer that. "Coffee then, whatever. Come on, just come inside, Little Spencer." Carmen's was one of his favorite finds since coming to Port Charles two years ago. It was owned and run by a little old Italian couple who brewed the best cappuccino he had ever tasted and made fresh biscotti every day. The guys on the force favored Kelley's, it was right downtown and close to the station, but when Cruz needed a little peace and quiet, he always drove across town to Carmen's. There was surprisingly no one in the shop when they entered, but Mr. Santini waved Cruz over to his usual table. He was a regular after all.

Cruz ordered two cappuccinos for them and then turned his attention back on Lulu. She was breathing hard and heavy like she was trying to calm herself down and her eyes were a little wet, but the tears refused to spill over.

Cruz eyed her up and down: the too-tight top, the too-short skirt, the way-too-high heels. She looked like a kid playing dress up- which was exactly what she was. "Is this what you really want, Lulu? Selling yourself to the highest bidder?"

She swiped at her eyes, leaving mascara down her cheeks, and she was still taking shaky breaths. "He had information on Rick Webber, I knew what I was doing-"

"He was playing you for a fool, and he was going to take advantage of a pretty young girl who wanted some answers real bad," Cruz knew he sounded harsh, and he didn't care- until he saw the tears glistening in her eyes. He took a deep breath. "If you're going to prove your mother's innocence, there are better ways."

She looked down at her hands, twisting his handkerchief in her lap. She looked about twelve years old. "I don't know how. I don't even know where to begin."

Cruz groaned in frustration. "I told you, talk to Lucky. I've heard him talk about your mother- I know if he thought for a second he could clear her name, he would do anything-"

"No, you can't tell Lucky," Lulu's hand shot across the table and grabbed his, holding on firmly. Her hand was warm and soft and surprisingly strong- and Cruz was not prepared for the electricity that shot through his entire body when his skin touched hers.

She leaned her head close to his across the table, and Cruz couldn't help but be amused at how she liked to behave like she had any discretion at all after what he had caught her doing in this past week. "I don't know if you know this, but Elizabeth has had two miscarriages. They...They have enough to worry about right now."

Cruz sucked in a low breath. He hadn't known. And now he could agree with Lucky- Elizabeth worked way too damn much. He swallowed. "And Nikolas?"

She sighed, and sat back in her chair, folding her hands back around her steaming cup of cappuccino. He pretended not to feel that twinge of disappointment when her hand left his. "Nikolas would never do anything so huge as open an investigation into Rick Webber's death without telling Lucky about it."

Cruz cursed himself. This was trouble, plain and simple. Trouble between himself and his partner, complications he didn't need or have time for in his life. He looked down at her, tears glistening in her big blue eyes, lower lip trembling, but her chin was set at a stubborn, proud angle, holding in that sob. Although, like any man, he was putty against a pretty girl crying, watching her fight it broke his heart even more. He swore under his breath, and she looked up at him. He was in for it now. "I'll...I'll help you."

_music used in this section: Save Yourself (Sensefield), Teenage Wasteland (The Who) and At This Point In My Life (Tracy Chapman)_


	3. Chapter 3

**Word Count: **3764

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_I'd like to say how truly bright you are_

_You don't know me but I know you..._

Lulu was surprised by how charmed she was by Cruz Rodriguez's house. She expected him to live in some sparse bachelor's apartment. She couldn't help but smile looking at the small but tidy bungalow she found at the given residence she had 'borrowed' from Lucky and Elizabeth's address book. Lulu wasn't sure why it surprised her so much- it was just that owning his own house seemed like a very grown up thing. Even Lucky and Liz didn't own their own home. Lulu wondered how much older Cruz was than her brother- and tangentially, how much older he was than her.

"Well, no time like the present to prove your mother's innocence," Lulu said to herself, marching up to the front door. She wrapped sharply on the dark wood three times.

No answer.

Well...Cruz didn't exactly know she was coming over. And it _was_ 7:30 on Sunday morning. But still...He had promised her he'd help her with her mother's case. He _must_, of course, realize that she'd want to start right away.

She knocked three more times harder. Still no answer. Now Lulu was getting impatient. With her open palm, she banged repeatedly on the door until she could hear someone muttering in disgruntled Spanish on the other side. Cruz Rodriguez finally opened the door, looking like the cover of some Harlequin romance novel, with black sweatpants slung low on his hips, and his lean, hard chest bare. His hair was tousled, his dark eyes were heavy-lidded and sleepy, and for the first time in her life, Lulu could feel her heat shoot out from her belly down her legs, to the tips of her fingers, all the way up her chest and into her neck just from looking at a man. She opened her mouth to speak, and her jaw just hung open.

Cruz was still rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, but when his gaze finally met hers, when he realized who was standing on his porch, he nearly jumped back from the door.

Not exactly the warm welcome she had been hoping for.

"You told me you would help me." She knew she sounded like a spoiled child, but she could form no other thoughts when he was standing there with no shirt on.

Cruz dragged a hand through his thick black hair, and Lulu realized she had never seen him without it perfectly combed into place, looking professional and masculine. Right now, he looked like some sexy Latin heartthrob off some sappy afternoon movie that her grandma Lesley used to watch. Then he yawned, and he looked like a little boy. "What time is it, Lulu?"

"Seven-thirty."

He groaned and covered his face with both hands. "One day to sleep in in two weeks." Holding his forehead in his hands, he shook his head, and looking back up at her, he pulled her inside, and Lulu couldn't help but feel how warm his big hand was, even through the thick layer of her down jacket. "You might as well come on inside, it's freezing out there," he said, shutting the door behind her. The entrance to his home opened into a combined dining room/living room area, with a kitchen set up on the left. Behind the kitchen was a short hallway where she guessed his bedroom was located. Cruz's furniture was simple without looking impersonal, and tasteful without being too girly or artsy. It suited him well, Lulu thought to herself.

He padded barefoot into his kitchen and flipped on the coffee pot. "Sit down, take your coat off. I don't suppose you would mind if I took a quick shower, would you?"

Lulu shook her head, though the thought of him inside the shower very well made her mouth go dry. "Well, thank you, Little Spencer, that's very kind and generous of you. You can help yourself to some coffee if you like, I'll be back in a few minutes."

Lulu laid her coat over one of the arms on his sofa, and took a closer look around the house while Cruz...showered. To distract herself from the sound of the spray in the bathroom, she looked at the pictures he had neatly lined up on the mantle. Lulu noted that she couldn't find a speck of dust in the entire house. Cruz was a neatfreak.

Lulu picked up one of the pictures, of a beautiful little boy with dark hair and a handsome woman with the same eyes. She heard Cruz re-entering the room, and hoped that a showered, dressed Cruz wouldn't quite have the same effect on her as a half-naked, sleepy-sexy Cruz would. She turned...and no such luck. He was just pulling on a knit shirt that clearly defined every muscle in his chest- she had no idea he worked out so much- and his black hair was just a little bit wet and glistening. His eyes were clear and alert now, and Lulu had never realized just how long and curly his eyelashes were- almost pretty. She cleared her throat to shake herself. "Hey, who's this?".

"That's, uh, me...And my mother," Cruz said slowly, approaching her with caution when he saw her holding the frame. Lulu didn't know if it was because of the picture or he just didn't like people touching her things.

"How old are you here?" She was smiling at the old photograph. He rolled his eyes.

"Six."

She laughed, and looked up at him, and for a second Cruz's heart stopped when he saw how her eyes lit up when she laughed. "Gosh Detective, didn't know you could smile so wide."

He watched her move across his mantle, looking at each picture in turn. "This is you again, right?"

He sighed. "Yeah."

"Aaaaannnnddd...Is this your dad and...brother?" She was holding up another picture of him as a child, with another little boy and a tall, dark-haired man. They were all grinning widely and wearing New York Mets baseball caps.

"No, that's..." Lulu bit back her lip to keep from smiling. She knew that they really needed to get right down to busines, but if she was honest with herself...She really was curious about his life. It seemed everyone in town knew the great love story of Luke and Laura, including Cruz Rodriguez, but she knew nothing about him past that he was a nice guy, a good cop who worked with her brother. "That's, um...That's Alex and Eddie."

"Friends?"

"Yeah, well..." Cruz took the picture out of her hands, gently placing the frame back on the mantle. "Well," he sat down on the couch and took a deep breath. "My...My dad was a New York City cop, and he...He was killed in a convenience store hold up before I was born."

Now Lulu felt like a jerk. "Oh, Cruz, look I'm sorry, I don't mean to bring up bad memories-"

"No, it's fine," Cruz shrugged, and he looked her in the eye. He truly was an unreadable man. "Hell, I don't even remember. But uh...Eddie was the clerk in the store, and my dad saved his life. So...After I was born, Eddie and his wife, and Alex- that's the other kid right there- they started to come around and visit me and Mom, and well, I guess Eddie was like a dad to me, and Alex was like...a big brother."

"What's all this 'was'?" Lulu smiled, sitting down next to him. "You don't see them any more, you're not close with them any more?"

Cruz smiled at her, a sort of half-smile that was full of secrets, and Lulu felt drawn to it in spite of herself. "I was the best man at Alex's wedding."

"And that's this, huh?" Lulu said, rising as she saw the wedding picture on the mantle. Not a formal pose taken by a professional photographer, but Cruz and a grown-up Alex, with a pretty red-headed young woman in a wedding gown, with their arms slung around each other, each holding what looked like a tequila shot up in the air. Once again, Cruz was smiling that wide smile that he had in his childhood pictures. "Looks like a good time. So, how long ago was this-"

But Lulu stopped short when she turned to look back at Cruz. His eyes were dark and stormy and he none-too-gently took the picture out of her hands and slammed it back down on the mantle. It fell flat with a _snap_. She flinched in surprise, but he didn't soften this time. "Look, you were the one who banged on my door at the crack of dawn and insisted that we work today. I've got other cases I can actually solve and a _real job_ and if all you want to do is interview me about my life, then I don't have time to screw around with a kid today."

"_Sorry_, I didn't know how much of a nuisance this was to you, or how babyish it was to try to prove my mother's innocence." She grabbed her coat, with her back turned to him, and made her way for the door, angrily slamming it open.

"Lulu, _stop_," she heard his firm voice, just as she got the door open. She didn't turn around, but she did stop, and jumped slightly when she felt his hands on her shoulders. "Lulu, I'm sorry I yelled. It's, uh...It's been a frustrating week...I just...Look, why don't we just sit down and look at your mother's case."

Lulu's breathing hitched in her throat. "You said you have cases you can _actually_ solve." Taking a deep breath, she turned to face him. He was standing so very close to her, with his hands still resting on her shoulders. It was almost an embrace. "You don't think I have any hope, do you?"

Cruz took his hands away and exhaled. "Honestly? I don't know." He expected her face to fall, he expected those tears that had been faltering on the edge of her eyelids practically since the moment this whole debacle started to spill over. But her eyes held his gaze and she seemed- relieved? That he was being level with her. "Look, I looked over the file-"

"You did?" Lulu asked, her eyebrow raised.

"I told you I'd help you, didn't I," he smiled at her. "I looked it over- it was pretty open and shut four years ago." Her face did fall, and she put her hand on the doorknob again. Tilting her chin up with his forefinger, Cruz looked her in the eye. "Look, Little Spencer. Nothing is impossible. Let me help you."

The first day yielded nothing but the facts. Laura Spencer had been in the attic of her childhood home with her stepfather, Rick Webber. Repressed memories had spurned some type of mental breakdown, and in the throes of a panic, Laura struck Webber on the head with a candlestick, killing him instantly. Both of their DNA was later found all over the room, an no one else's. It was a pretty airtight case, but Cruz was reluctant to say that to Lulu. Though he was hesitant to admit it to himself, it broke his heart a little bit to see the hope go out of her eyes the way it had that first morning. But something in his instincts, in his experience, told him that something was off.

The time frame for one. There was just too much damn time between the last time Laura and Webber were seen before Webber's death, and when Laura was found afterwards- and even then, she was found by her beloved husband, who had a reputation for not always telling the strict truth in police reports. But there was almost an entire day that didn't have any details in it except for the fact that a man was killed. And there were too many possibilities. God knew that Luke and Laura Spencer had enemies for days, enemies that would gladly see Laura framed.

Starting with the Cassadines. He knew a little bit about Nikolas and his family, but some of the stuff that they uncovered about the grandmother, and Mikkos and Stavros was all truly sick stuff. Lulu's eyes went wide reading about how Helena Cassadine had murdered the district attorney's mother.

"You gonna be okay with this kind of stuff, Little Spencer?" he'd asked her when they started reading about the years of captivity and abuse her mother had suffered at the hands of the Cassadines. Instead of answering him, she'd ripped the file out of his hands. He didn't know why she did things like that. She certainly didn't need to prove to him how tough she was.

But Lulu Spencer surprised him sometimes. She was good- really good, picking up little clues and pieces of the puzzle before he could even put two and two together. She was getting a taste for detectiving- and she was a natural. She showed up at the ass-crack of dawn every day that he had off, and they even started meeting at Carmen's at night sometimes. After their first night there, dragging her out of the Oasis, he had gone in for a cappuccino after a hard day, and found her helping Mr. Santini bus. He should have been annoyed that his sanctuary had been invaded, but after all, he had brought her there. And he couldn't help the smile on her face, watching her move around the room. She looked like a happy, carefree teenager for once, doing a normal teenaged job.

"_What are you doing?" _

"_Oh nothing, just it was busy, so I thought I'd help out."_

_Cruz grinned. "What, do you work here now?"_

_She'd laughed. "Relax, Detective, I just cleared a couple of tables. It's hardly an honest day's shift."_

Cruz couldn't help it- he was starting to admire his partner's baby sister.

And if he was honest with himself, it wasn't just for her forensics skills. Throughout the long days and nights that they were working, Cruz noticed other things about her. Lulu could tell the most outrageously dirty jokes that were in direct contrast to her angelic face. She smiled when she figured something out- really wide and proud. When she did that, it was hard to put the image of her, up on stage at the Oasis out of his mind. Not a day went by that her eyes didn't flash, her hand didn't brush against his, the spicy-sweet scent of her didn't get under his skin and he wasn't taken back to that image of her, on stage, scared out of her mind but absolutely determined that she go through with whatever crazy plan imight/i help her mother. Crazy kid. And he absolutely didn't care to dwell on what the effect that image had on him. Not just the vulnerability in her eyes that tugged at his heart, but her golden skin, her luscious curves, that coy, sex-kitten pout.

And sometimes, she reminded him of just how young she really was.

Cruz came home one night after a long day at the station to see the now-familiar sight of Lulu perched on his front steps. She had a bag of take-out with her, which he was grateful for, since it was already 8 o'clock, and the last thing he felt like doing now was cooking. "Hey there, Little Spencer, what'd you got there?"

She grinned up at him. "Ribs and baked potatoes from Eli's. Lucky swears by them. So I figured it was cop chow."

He laughed. "Sounds about right, you brought enough for two?" She nodded, still smiling that perfect devil-hiding-behind-an-angel smile of hers. "Well, come on in, Lulu, God how long have you been waiting? It's freezing out here." He took the bag from her and let her inside. Cruz noticed how comfortable she was in his home- getting plates and napkins and silverware out of the cabinets and drawers and setting everything up on the table. "It really was nice of you to bring over dinner, you didn't have to do that."

"Hey, you're helping me solve a thirty-year-old murder, the least I can do is feed you," she smiled as she grabbed two beers out of the fridge.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you think you're doing there?" Cruz grinned wryly as she set the two longneck bottles on the table with the plates. "You might act like you're forty-seven, but you're still only eighteen. Put the beers back."

"Come on, Detective, you can't have ribs without beer," she said, disregarding him and cracking hers open with the bottle-opener she had found in his utensil drawer.

He cleared his throat, and took the bottle off the table before she could take a sip. God, those eyes when she looked up at him. He felt like he had just stolen candy from a baby. Which._.No, don't even go there, Rodriguez._ "Lulu...I'm a cop," he said, almost apologetically. "I could lose my badge if I give you a beer."

"Cruz," she said, a little half-smile on her face. "I think you know better than anyone how good I am at keeping a secret."

She_ did_ have a point. And one beer...well, Cruz had to admit that he couldn't really deny her anything when she was looking at him like that. He handed the bottle over, and her fingers lingered over his for a second before she took it.

He sat and situated his napkin over his lap, and opened his own beer bottle before digging into his ribs. "So...how's school, Lulu? How is it that you ever actually manage to study when every time I turn around, you're always right there with some new piece of information you want me to look at."

She shrugged and winked at him. She actually winked, and Cruz felt his chest tightening the way it always seemed to around her. "How is it that you ever manage to _'actually solve cases on your real job' _when every time I turn around, I'm always right there bugging you with some new piece of information I want you to look at?" Cruz smiled for a second and then he laughed. This girl was such a trip. She laughed with him for a second, and then looked down. "You're a good cop, you know, Cruz. I...I don't know where I would be with this case without you."

"You're pretty good yourself, Little Spencer," he replied. "Just as good as your brother, and almost- _almost_- as good as me."

But she wasn't smiling at that. "No, I'm serious. I...I never thanked you for getting me out of there, that night. At the Oasis." Cruz swallowed hard, his eyes meeting hers, his ribs and beer forgotten. She had never spoken of that night, and he could see that referencing the night of her weakness was one of the more difficult things she had ever done. "I...I don't know what I would have done if you hadn't stopped me. It was...It was pretty stupid of me, and I was getting in way over my head, so...Thank you."

Cruz swallowed hard again. He knew that neither her gratitude or her trust was easily won, and it killed her to be so vulnerable. So, he took a risk of his own- one he knew could get him into trouble. He reached his hand across the table and covered her hand with his. "Lulu, look at me," she raised her eyes from the table and looked him square in the eye. "You have to promise me that you will _never_ do anything like that again."

She shook her head, "No, clearly not, I could never...never take my clothes off-"

"No, you need to _promise_," Cruz said more firmly, holding her hand tighter, so that she would look him in the eye again. "Promise me you won't put yourself in any danger for this case. I know how bad you want this. And you're reckless, and you're beautiful, and you're too damn brave for your own good, and there are too many scumbags out there like Boudreauz who would take advantage of that. You need to _promise_ me that you won't do anything_ stupid_ like that ever again."

Lulu's heart was in her throat, pounding in her ears. He was looking at her so intently, his dark eyes strong and passionate about this, but she was absolutely frozen. He had called her ibeautiful/i. And it wasn't just that he had said it, it was the way it had seamlessly slipped out while he scolded her like a child. She never thought she would be such a girl about boys saying she was pretty- but Cruz Rodriguez was clearly no boy. He was still gripping her hand, still holding her in his gaze, and she realized he was waiting for her to answer him.

"I...I told you, Cruz, I'm going to do whatever it takes to prove my mother's innocent," she said. He_ had_ to get this. "I mean, I won't do anything..._very_ illegal, and it's not like I'm going to hurt anyone or anything-"

"You're going to hurt yourself!" Cruz let go of her hand, and Lulu saw his eyes flash with the hint of a temper she had never seen before. "And you can't...I don't want you to get hurt, Lulu."

"Because of my brother," she said, and realized she sounded like she was whining.

"No, because of _you_," Cruz said, and he sounded so solemn that her heart thudded. He sighed, and visibly tried to relax his demeanor. "Look...Yeah, it's true, that if anything ever happened to you, Lucky would have my head on a platter, and I couldn't really blame him. But more than that, I can't stand the thought of anything happening to you- the thought of some bastard like Frank Boudreauz getting his hands on you..."

The raw emotion in his voice hit Lulu square in the chest like a ton of bricks. He cared about _her_, that much. She put her own small hand over his this time. "So, what are you saying, Detective, that we're _friends_?"

He laughed, the tension and the seriousness of the conversation broken. "Yeah, Little Spencer, I guess we're friends now." He grinned and winked at her, and Lulu's heart skipped a beat. "Now eat your dinner and drink that illegal beer of yours."

_music used in this section: Who Needs Shelter (Jason Mraz) and Star Mile (Joshua Radin)_


	4. Chapter 4

**Word Count:** 1832

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_You and I, we're two of a kind,_

_I hate to say it but you'll never relate,_

_What makes you tick? It makes me smile._

"More biscotti, Detective?" Cruz looked up at the warm smile of Mrs. Santini. It was late at Carmen's, and the café was almost cleared out. He was looking over photographs taken in Rick Webber's attic. He'd been staring at them for the past week and his eyes were starting to cross and go blurry.

"No, Mrs. Santini, you're going to make me fat," Cruz grinned at the sweet old lady, and she laughed heartily.

"You could use a some of the meat on your bones, Detective," she said, flirtatiously, her accent only serving to make her more coquettish, even at sixty-five. She placed two more cookies on his plate anyway and poured more coffee in his lukewarm cup, nearly empty. Hearing the merry laughter across the shop, they both looked up to see Lulu and Mr. Santini joking amiably as they cleared tables from the after-dinner crowd.

This was another thing that was becoming far too regular. The nights were getting warmer in late March, almost unseasonably warm, and he kept suggesting that they meet at Carmen's instead of at his house. It was a nice walk from the station and also PCU, and also...Also, the closed off comfort and privacy of his own home, with his own bedroom only yards away.

Lulu's eyes met his from across the room, and she smiled.

Dammit. She didn't even have to try, and he could almost feel himself getting hard.

He tried to breathe easy as she walked over to his table, with a cappuccino in a cardboard take-away cup. "Lula, you take home some tip money tonight, you don't work for free, no?" Mrs. Santini clucked over Lulu, smoothing her blond hair away from her eyes.

"No, Mrs. Santini, I hardly do anything," Lulu never took the tip money the Santinis offered. Cruz knew she lived in the biggest mansion in town with the richest family, but it was still something he admired about her. She looked back at Cruz and grinned widely. "You ready to go?"

"Yeah, sure, just a second," Cruz said, as he saw Mr. Santini struggling to take some boxes out of the back. Lulu watched him go help the old man, not even straining as he lifted the hefty parcels over his shoulder.

"Do you need help with anything else, Mrs. Santini?" Lulu asked, sipping her cappuccino. Damn, if nothing else, she would be forever grateful to Cruz for introducing her to Carmen's cappuccino.

"No, Lula, you just relax and wait for your boyfriend," Mrs. Santini said, smiling as she headed back into the kitchen, before Lulu could even correct her.

"Ready?" Cruz asked, coming back out to the table and pulling on his sportcoat

This was another part of their routine that was becoming far too regular. Sometimes they didn't leave Carmen's until after midnight. From that first day that she showed up at his front door at the crack of dawn, she would leave at all hours of the night- eleven-thirty, midnight, quarter to one.

"_Don't they wonder where you are?" he'd asked at first._

"_The Quartermaines?" she'd laughed, almost a little too bitterly. "Oh, please. They hardly even realize that I'm there."_

How a girl like her didn't have a soul in the world to look out for her, Cruz did not know. He knew she had her brothers, but they had families of their own to worry about. So, it seemed it was just him.

But no matter how she insisted, he didn't let her go home alone, ever. At the very least, wen he dropped her off at the end of the Quartermaine's massive driveway and saw her enter the house, he knew she wouldn't be doing anything crazy, like try to go after a lead by herself.

Not that there were many leads to go on.

Cruz was starting to get a sinking feeling that this case was going nowhere. Lulu powered on, never losing her optimism or her absolute faith in her mother's gut instinct that she was innocent. But Cruz was beginning to realize that they were chasing clues around in circles. Was Laura Spencer really a killer? Honestly, he didn't think so. There were too many holes in the case. Just nothing with which to fill them in.

The day had been warm and Lulu didn't have a jacket. So Cruz slung his sportcoat over her shoulders as they walked the few blocks to the station where his car was parked. Lulu held it close around her. Over the past few months, she had grown to really love the way he smelled. And she knew he didn't wear any cologne; it was just a clean scent, masculine, and 100 Cruz Rodriguez.

They were cutting through the park when a noise in the bushes startled him, and before Lulu knew it, he had his gun drawn on a...very confused-looking fat squirrel.

"Got a little bit of a hair trigger there, don't you, Detective?" Lulu asked, eyebrows raised.

"Sorry," he said, relaxing his hold on his weapon. "Cop's instinct, I guess." The truth was he'd had a suspicious feeling for weeks that he was being watched. Nothing out of the ordinary had happened, just a creepy feeling on the back of his neck. He moved to re-holster his gun, but Lulu reached for it.

"Can I hold it?" She asked, smiling hopefully.

"Can you _hold it_?" he asked, laughing incredulously. "A gun isn't a toy, Lulu."

She rolled her eyes. "I know a gun isn't a toy. Just...I never have before, and don't you think handling a weapon is something I should know?"

He blinked. "Um, _no_, I absolutely do _not_ think it's something you should know."

"Come on, Detective," she said with a sweet smile, her voice a little breathy. "Teach me." Cruz felt his heart sink. She had him. He wondered if she actually _knew_ how much she could get out of him with just a wink and a smile, or if she was totally innocent of the effect she had on him.

"All right," he sighed. "I'll teach you." He removed the chamber.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa!" she said, holding up her hands. "Why are you taking out the bullets?" And he had to grin at that. No Spencer was _totally_ innocent.

"You think I'm really going to hand you a loaded weapon here in the park? We'll save the shooting range for next time."

"So there _will_ be a next time, huh, Detective?" she smiled dazzlingly at him, and he just laughed.

"We'll see, Little Spencer, we'll see." He put the gun in her hand, and she immediately held it out with one arm, her chest puffed out like in some bad old Western. "Whoa, there, John Wayne!" he said, holding his hands in the air and stepping away.

"What?" she said, grinning impishly. "That's how my dad does it."

"Well, you're going to learn how to do it the right way, not the Cowboys and mobsters way." Cruz said, moving around behind her.

She watched him with amusement. "Okay, _Dad_."

He laughed, entirely unamused. "Don't joke about that, Lulu. You know, I _am_ old enough to be your father."

She rolled her eyes. "Cruz, do you _know_ how old my father is? Besides, you can't be any more than, what? Thirty-five?"

Now he wasn't unamused- he was _pissed_. "Thirty-_one_!"

"Oh," Lulu said, her eyes wide. Then she broke into a fit of uncontrollable laughter.

"It's not funny," he shook his head. When he'd turned thirty-one back in December, he'd been glad that the hurdles of his twenties were over. Now, a few months later, he felt his age quite keenly next to Lulu Spencer and her fresh-faced youth.

"You're right, it's not funny. I'm sorry, Cruz," Lulu said, barely able to keep her giggles down.

He sighed. He was doing his best not to act like a crybaby about the whole thing, but that stung.

"Oh, come on, Cruz," Lulu pleaded, seeing the sad, beat-up look on his face. "You iknow/i you're hot."

He raised his eyebrows. "I'm _what_?" This converstaion was sure getting more interesting- and way more uncomfortable. Cruz swallowed hard, and she stopped laughing, blushing pink right up to her hairline.

"Cruz, come on," Lulu said, not quite so giddy as she had been a moment ago. "You _know_..." She whispered so softly that Cruz could hardly hear her. His breath caught in his throat. He'd never even entertained the possibility that this...whatever he had been going through for the past few months, whenever he was around her, could actually be _mutual_. As long as he hadn't thought of that, he was just some loser, lusting after his buddy's kid sister. _This_ made it all the more lethal.

"Okay," he said. It was almost a croak. "Why don't I show you how to shoot, so we can get out of here?"

"Okay, she said, shakily.

He shook himself a little. "All right, so your shooting arm is the one you write with, and you're a rightie, so take the gun in your right hand."

"Like this?" Lulu said, taking her previous stance.

"No, you've got to hold it like this," he said, moving behind her. This was a dangerous game he was playing, but he _couldn't_ be this close to her and not touch her. Moving his right hand over hers, he positioned her fingers the correct way over the handle. "Keep your hand tight, but your finger light over the trigger. And keep your arm a little loose. Then you bring your left arm up to brace your shot." Lulu had all but stopped breathing as Cruz took her left hand in his. "Now you find your target," his voice was practically a growl, rumbling in her ear, and Lulu closed her eyes and almost melted into his arms. "Like that tree branch over there. Can you see it?"

"Yeah," she whispered. He chuckled low.

"Sweetheart, your eyes are closed," he said softly.

"What? Okay, right. The branch," Lulu said. "Now what?"

Cruz was silent for a minute, and Lulu could almost feel the world stop turning on its axis, just standing in his arms, his breath warm in her ear. In all these months, she had only wondered, and never known how big and strong and solid he was or how safe she would feel in his arms. And somehow- the knowing was even more torturous than the wondering. "Cruz?" she whispered.

"BANG!" He shouted. She shrieked, and then collapsed against him, white as a sheet, in peals of tear-inducing, sobbing laughter. He was still holding her tightly in his arms, laughing just as hard as she.

"Come on," he said, between laughing and brushing her hair away from her face. He could not stop touching her. "Let me take you back to that palace of yours, Princess."

_music used in this section: La Cienega Just Smiled (Ryan Adams) & Just Another (Pete Yorn)_


	5. Chapter 5

**Word Count: **5054

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing

_Days from last week, I cannot tell fiction from fact_

_But that night upon request, I could re-enact..._

_On the last night of not knowing you..._

"Man, do you remember when 'day off' meant actually not doing any work?" Lucky groaned, flipping the file he had been working with for the past few hours onto the table.

Cruz laughed. They both were supposed to be off that day, but the spring had yielded a run of drug overdoses- many of them from underage girls. Frank Boudreauz had beaten his charges way, way too quickly- thanks to some slick, hotshot lawyer who was rumored to be on Sonny Corinthos' payroll. The Oasis was still shut down- but now there were all these teenagers overdosing on amphetamine, and the PCPD knew that somehow Frank Boudreauz was involved. And so, on their 'day off', Cruz and Lucky were going through crime scene photos and testimonials on Lucky's dining room table, while Elizabeth took Cameron out to do errands.

"Yeah, man, I don't know how much longer I can look at these pictures. It's depressing," Cruz dropped his own file to the table, ran a hand through his hair and sighed.

Lucky's phone rang and he answered, and then mouthed _my wife_ to Cruz, smiling that wide grin that everyone at the station had come to know as Spencer's 'Elizabeth' smile. "Hello?...Yeah, I'm just working here with Cruz on a case...Oh, I knew I loved you for a reason...Wait a second, what are you doing driving?...Oh, okay, that's good...All right, I'll tell him...Love you. See you in a bit." When he hung up the phone, he was still smiling. "'Lizabeth is bringing home ribs from Eli's, and we're baby-sitting for Spence tonight, because Nikolas took Emily into the city. She invited you to stay."

"Well, sure," Cruz said. "Wait a second, what's Elizabeth doing driving?" She was eight months pregnant, and very uncomfortable according to Lucky. The last place she should have been was behind a wheel.

Lucky laughed. "Thanks for your concern, partner, but Lulu is with her."

Cruz felt a cold sweat break out on his forehead. Lulu and Lucky, all in the same room, pretending like he didn't spend every spare minute he had these days either helping her investigate their mother's case? And when they weren't actually looking into Rick Webber's murder, he was quasi-flirting with her, cartwheeling that ultra-fine line between 'Helping-Out-A-Buddy's-Kid-Sister' and 'His-Buddy-Was-Going-To-Kick-His-Ass-If-He-Ever-Found-Out-Exactly-What-Thoughts-Were-Going-Through-His-Head'. Actually facing the situation like a man- Cruz thought he might just be too much of a coward for that. Because surely only cowards would hit on a sweet young thing like Lulu Spencer and then turn and smile at the man they called 'partner'. "Maybe I should go. I mean, it sounds like you have a full house already anyways," Cruz said, standing and reaching for his coat.

"No, no, stay," Lucky said. "If I know my wife, 'Lizabeth bought enough food to feed an army and it will actually work out better this way."

"It will?" Cruz asked, dubiously.

"Yeah, yeah, this way you can help Lulu keep an eye on the boys while I get dinner ready, and Liz will get the chance to relax a little. Besides, Cam's been asking about you."

"He has?" Now Cruz felt a little trapped- he couldn't very well disappoint a five-year-old.

"Yeah, well, he's just fascinated with all things police-related these days," Lucky grinned proudly at that. "And also, he's been learning a little Spanish in school. I think he wants to show off."

"Um, okay," Cruz said. He hadn't spent much time with Cameron other than saying hello and goodbye and ruffling his hair at the station, but Elizabeth and Lucky's little boy was a good kid.

"Yeah, sorry, do you mind getting roped into a little baby-sitting?" Lucky asked.

"No, that's fine," Cruz laughed. "I figure I better earn my dinner anyways."

Lulu had to admit she felt a little blindsided when she walked into Liz and Lucky's apartment, cooing baby talk to Spencer, and found Cruz sitting at the dining table with her brother, in one of those ridiculously sexy knit shirts he wore on his days off, that clearly defined every muscle in his chest and arms. His eyes met hers through Elizabeth's friendly greetings and Cameron running across the room in Lucky's arms, and she felt her face flush pink.

"Cruz! _Hola!_" Cameron said excitedly.

Cruz had to chuckled, focusing on the little boy, and grateful for the distraction. "_Hola_, little man. _Que tal?_"

"Ummm," Cameron said, thinking hard about that question. "_Hola!_"

Everyone laughed at that, except for Lulu, who was doing her best to hide behind Spencer, but that didn't work for long. "Lulu, come on, you remember Cruz, right? Why don't you say hi?" Lucky called to her. _Damn her brother._

"Hey," she said, dumbly.

He just nodded and smiled. If Lucky or Liz noticed how awkwardly they greeted each other, they didn't let on, but it was highly unlikely that either noticed in the excitement of getting the kids settled and dinner out. Lulu thought she should join in and help instead of standing like a statue in the middle of the room, and Spencer was getting fussy. Not to mention Elizabeth really looked like she could use a break. "Liz, why don't you go lie down and take a nap?"

"Oh, I'm fine," Elizabeth said, through a yawn.

"No, Elizabeth, seriously," Lucky said, firmly. "I'll take care of getting dinner set up, it's going to be at least a half hour. And Lulu and Cruz can watch the kids."

"Yeah, we can..." Lulu half-gulped. So he was _staying._

"Yes!" Cameron pumped his fist in the air.

"Yeah, go lie down for a little bit," Lucky said, stroking his wife's face tenderly. "We can handle it out here."

"Well, if you guys are sure..." Liz said, looking like she was ready to drop. She headed off into the bedroom.

Cruz nervously looked from Lulu to Lucky. "Lucky, can I help you in the kitchen?" He asked hopefully. Anything better than playing house with Lulu. It was bad enough that Eli's already reminded him of her- now he had to sit and have a family dinner like a couple of in-laws.

"No, I've got it," Lucky said. "You just hang out here."

_Thanks, partner,_ he thought to himself. _You know I've been fantasizing about your sister for months, right?_

"Let me show you my hat!" Cameron said, pulling Cruz towards his toychest behind the couch.

"Um, okay," Cruz answered, allowing the little boy to pull him away.

"Well, nephew of mine," Lulu said, holding him up to look his auntie in the eye. "Your daddy may be a Cassadine, but you're about to learn your first lesson from your aunt about some _Spencer_ deception. Can I count on you for back-up?" Spencer seemed to ponder this thoughtfully for a second and then began to gnaw on his fist. "Thanks, kid," Lulu said. "I knew you were my man."

Lulu didn't need to worry so about being alone with Cruz. The kids proved to be a welcome distraction and Elizabeth couldn't seem to stay down for her nap, and came out to use the bathroom three times. "The joys of pregnancy," she grumbled as she walked past. Cameron drew them both into some sort of intricate game of hide-and-seek, where only he knew the rules, and was always the inevitable winner, and for whatever reason, deemed Spencer the 'bad guy'.

"Why are you making your baby cousin be the bad guy?" Lulu asked.

"Can't you see how mean he looks?" Cameron asked.

Cruz and Lulu looked at Spencer, sitting on the couch like a fat, happy Buddha, cheerfully drooling on one of Elizabeth's throw pillows. "Yeah, ferocious," Cruz said, winking at Lulu, and she just had to ease up and laugh.

So by the time dinner rolled around, Lulu was almost comfortable with the situation, so long as she didn't think about how nice it felt to have Cruz hanging out with her family. And so long as she didn't stand too close to him. When she was near him, Lulu could almost feel a heat radiating from his skin and connecting directly to hers, as powerful as the sun's rays and gravity.

And so long as she didn't look at him. At all.

Dinner passed easily enough for Cruz. Cameron kept up a steady chatter in his ear with what he was learning in school and innocent questions about police work. Not that Cruz minded. The kid sure was funny. Elizabeth was pushing her food around her plate, and kept getting up to use the bathroom, and every time she did that, Lucky would ask Lulu if she thought everything was okay. Lulu would insist everything was fine, but when he looked away, she would shrug at Cruz, a worried expression on her face. Cruz could barely taste his food as he kept one eye on Lulu, breaking up little bites of chicken fingers for Spencer. This reminded him a bit too much of the last time he'd had Eli's ribs with Lulu. Then, the sweet image of her licking barbecue sauce off the corner of her mouth had stayed with him for weeks. He did his best to look away, but she was like a magnet to him.

Lucky pulled Cruz aside as he helped him clean up in the kitchen after supper. "Hey man, can I ask you something?"

"Sure, what's up?" Cruz asked, as he rinsed plates in the sink.

Lucky pointed through the Dutch window at the scene of Lulu playing on the floor with the boys, Elizabeth watching from the couch. "What do you think of my sister?"

"What?" Cruz dropped the glass he was holding, nearly shattering it.

Lucky smiled. "Well, I was thinking about fixing her up with that rookie, Bobby Jamison. He's only a couple of years older than her, and well...With me and Nikolas always so wrapped up with the kids, I worry about her not having anyone to look out for her."

Cruz's mind was _racing_. Bobby Jamison was practically a teenager- and in fact, that made him totally appropriate for Lulu- but the thought of that _kid_ with his mouth and hands all over her tied Cruz's stomach in knots. "You, uh, you sure you want to do that?" Cruz asked, forcing his tone to be light.

"Well, yeah, he seems like a good guy," Lucky said, still watching the scene in the living room.

"Well, I mean, Lucky, yeah, he's an all right guy, but for your sister?" Cruz was really having a hard time keeping his voice and his temper down.

"Why not?" Have you heard anything?" Lucky asked, turning to him, concerned.

"Oh, well, you know...You always hear about him with a new girl every week," Now Cruz just felt like a dirtbag. He didn't think Bobby Jamison would have any more confidence than to sputter a shy 'hello' to a little blond bombshell like Lulu Spencer, let alone a different girl every week.

"Oh," Lucky said, puzzled. "I hadn't heard that about him. Oh well, it was just an idea." Though it was totally juvenile, Cruz felt a sense of relief.

And then they both heard Cameron shrieking in the living room.

Lucky ran in, with Cruz right behind him. "Dad! Momma had an accident!" He pointed to the puddle at Elizabeth's feet, which was, thankfully, clear and not red.

"It's not an accident, sweetie," Elizabeth said, breathing hard and heavy, and clutching her belly. "It's...Oh God...It's too early..."

"It's okay, baby, it's okay," Lucky said, his voice anything but steady. He reached a hand out to push Elizabeth's hair back from her forehead, and Cruz saw that his hand was shaking too. He looked to Lulu, but she was standing in the middle of the room holding Spencer, frozen, her eyes locked on Elizabeth.

"Okay, um, we know what to do, let's just get in the car," Lucky said, sounding so scared Cruz had to do a doubletake. His hand was shaking so bad, he couldn't even fish his keys out of his pocket.

"Lucky, um, why don't you let me drive?" Cruz said, putting a hand out to stop him. He leaned close to Lucky, lowering his voice. "You look like a wreck, man. You need to sit with Elizabeth and help her breathe."

Lucky swallowed hard, and Cruz could see sweat beading on his forehead. "Okay," He turned to his wife, trying for a brave smile. "Okay, Elizabeth, Cruz is going to drive us, is that all right, baby?"

"I...don't...care," she answered through gritted teeth. She _did_ smile bravely at her son, who was watching them both with wide eyes. "Just get me to the hospital, fast!" Lucky was already helping her up, and Cruz turned back to Lulu. She was still completely frozen, even though Spencer was yanking at fistfuls of her hair.

"Lulu, can you follow us with the kids in Elizabeth's car?" Cruz asked her. She still didn't move. "Little Spencer!"

At that, Lulu snapped, and Cruz realized he had used his affectionate nickname for her, and they both looked to Lucky, but he was far too preoccupied with his wife. "Yeah, I'm fine," she said, and he heard the dogged resolve in her voice. She would get through this. "It's okay," she said, looking him in the eye. He nodded and ran down to his car where Lucky and Elizabeth were already waiting to go to General Hospital.

Lulu almost felt as though everything happened in a blur. Once they got to GH, her Aunt Bobbie met them in OB in less than five minutes, and she made sure that everything was taken care of. Lucky disappeared into the labor room with her, but Audrey Hardy and her Grandma Lesley stopped by every so often with an update on Elizabeth's condition. Somehow, Lulu found the presence of mind to call Nikolas. He was having himself and Emily helicoptered back to Port Charles immediately. But after that, after she went and sat back down in the plastic chair, absent mindedly bouncing Spencer on her knee, she completely froze. Cameron was asking question after question, and thank God for Cruz, because Lulu couldn't answer them.

Thank God for Cruz. He sat next to her and patiently answered every question of a scared five-year-old who had never seen his mommy hurt and his daddy so worried before. If he wasn't there, Lulu may have very well just fallen apart. It was _too damn early_ for Elizabeth and this baby- almost four weeks too early. It just wasn't fair. Elizabeth and Lucky had waited so long for this, they had done everything right, and now their dreams might be snatched out from under them. And Elizabeth- Lulu didn't know if she could go through the pain of losing another baby. Neither Mrs. Hardy or Grandma Lesley had had any good news for them yet. Dr. Lee wasn't able to stop the labor.

Cameron kept getting up and pacing around the waiting room, almost as if he were looking for his parents.

"What'cha doing there, buddy?" Cruz asked.

"Can I go see my dad now?"

"No, your dad's in with your mom and the doctors right now. He'll be out later."

"Is my mom really sick?"

"She's not...sick, buddy. More like she's a little hurt and they're worried about the baby."

"Is the baby sick?"

"The doctors are trying to make it better," Cruz answered, and Lulu had to admit that was a good save. He didn't lie to him, and he still made him feel safer. "Come on, Cam, why don't you sit up here with me?" He pulled the little boy up into the chair next to him, and distracted him by teaching him the Spanish words for different objects in the room. Clock, _reloj_. Table, _tabla_. Chair, _silla_. Light, _luz_.

By the time Nikolas and Emily got to the hospital, decked out in evening wear, Spencer was sleeping, Cam was resting quietly with Cruz, and Lulu was a wreck. Spencer woke up when he heard his daddy's voice, and reached for him. "What's going on, Lulu?" Nikolas asked.

"Elizabeth's in labor," Cruz answered for her. "Her water broke at their house after dinner tonight."

"I'm going to go check on her," Emily said, already on her way.

Nikolas turned to Cruz, who was holding a sleepy Cameron. "Thank you for keeping an eye on my family, Detective Rodriguez. I understand you really took control of the situation."

Sometimes Lulu wanted to laugh at how formal her oldest brother was. This wasn't one of those times.

"Well, Lucky's a good friend of mine," Cruz said. "It's no big deal, Mr. Cassadine."

"Well, things should be under control now. Please, don't let us hold up your night," Nikolas said.

Lulu worried for a second that he might go, but he shook his head. "It's all right. I want to see that everything turns out okay." Lulu felt relieved. She hadn't realized it, but she really did depend on him for so much at this point.

Emily came back to the waiting area. "Elizabeth and the baby are both stable, but it's going to be a while." Nikolas sighed, and rubbed Spencer's back as he started to fuss.

"Nikolas, why don't you take Spencer home?" Lulu suggested. Both kids were getting cranky, and she didn't know how much good it was to have Cameron in the hospital this whole time. "Cameron, too."

"I wanna stay," Cameron protested, sleepily.

"No, your aunt Lulu is right, buddy," Emily said, taking him in her arms. "We'll take you home and get some sleep, and then come back to the hospital tomorrow to see your mom."

"And the baby?" he asked.

"We'll see," Emily replied, but he was too tired to question that. "Lulu, are you coming?"

Lulu absent-mindedly shook her head. "I have to stay with Lucky."

"Lulu, come on, we're all leaving now. It's late, we'll take care of this all tomorrow," Nikolas said, trying to pull her along.

"Nikolas, I'll stay with her," Cruz spoke up. Lulu saw Nikolas' eyebrows raise, and held her breath for a second. "I'm staying too, anyways. I'll drive her home, when we find out about...everything." Lulu breathed an inaudible sigh of relief, and Nikolas turned to her.

"Lulu, do you feel comfortable with that?"

She loved her brother, but sometimes his damn propriety made her want to scream. "Yes, Nikolas, it's fine."

He sighed, and bid them goodbye, taking the sleepy children out of the hospital with Emily. Lulu turned to Cruz. "Thank you."

Lulu was very quiet after her brother and Emily left. Cruz just sat with her, not really knowing what to say, but he had a feeling that mindless small talk wouldn't have helped. So they both just sat silently, watching the second hand on the clock tick by, until Bobbie Spencer walked into the waiting room, ripping off her latex gloves.

She was smiling.

"It's okay, Lesley Lu, everything's fine," she said, and Lulu flew into her arms. Cruz thought for sure she was crying from the way that her back was trembling ever so slightly, but when she pulled back, her eyes were dry.

"I want to see Lucky," she said, her voice a little shaky, but Lulu was smiling so prettily that Cruz's breath caught in his throat.

"I thought you might," Bobbie said, wrapping an arm around her niece. "Are you coming too, Cruz? I hear you're the hero of the night."

"Oh, I don't know about that," Cruz ducked his head bashfully as he followed them down to the neo-natal unit. Audrey and Lesley were standing outside the window, looking at the little pink bundle, laying in a crib next to a grinning, if exhausted, Lucky.

"A girl?" Lulu said, her eyes wide.

"Yes, a girl," Audrey answered, proudly. "Audrey Jean Spencer. Oh, isn't she the most beautiful thing ever?"

"She's really okay then?" Lulu couldn't take her eyes off the glass. "How's Elizabeth?"

"Elizabeth is sleeping. Trust me, she needs it. As for our Audrey here, she is a little small. Only four pounds and six ounces, but her vitals are good, and she's otherwise a completely healthy little girl," Audrey answered.

Cruz peered through the glass at the beautiful sight of Lucky and his daughter. It almost put an ache in his chest.

"Grandma, why are you crying?" Lulu asked, hugging Lesley close.

"Oh, I'm sorry, honey," Lesley said, wiping tears from her eyes. "I just...I can't believe how much she looks like your mother. That perfect little face, and those eyes..."

"I was going to say how much she looked like you," Bobbie said, stroking Lulu's hair. "Almost exactly."

"Really?" Lulu asked. Lucky was settling little Audrey Jean in her crib and then he walked out into the hallway to confer with the rest of his family. "How is she, Lucky?"

"She is...perfect," Lucky said, still watching her though the window. "My little AJ." All of the women sighed over the adorable nickname. He turned to Cruz. "Thanks for waiting, man. I guess I owe you one."

Cruz shook his head. "It's nothing."

Lucky looked to Lulu. "I have a little time before Elizabeth wakes up. Do you want me to take you home now?"

Cruz put his hand on his partner's shoulder. "I'll take her, man, don't worry about it. Stay with your wife and your baby."

Lulu said goodbye to her family, and walked out of the hospital with Cruz, still looking through the glass at little AJ Spencer until they were gone.

She was quiet in the car. No, not quiet. Silent. And still. He would trade any of the time she was jabbering non-stop to just get her to not be so still. He thought that after the baby was born- and she was fine, and Elizabeth was fine- Lulu would stop worrying. But there was something else on her mind. So Cruz parked the car at Kelly's.

She finally looked at him. "What are we doing?"

He got out of the car, going around to her side and opening the door. He held out his hand for her. "Come on. Let's go for a walk by the waterfront, unwind a little."

She put her hand in his and wordlessly followed him. It was past midnight once again, and the docks were silent, except for the sounds of the waves gently lapping up against the piers. Her little hand felt good in his, and Cruz felt her absent-mindedly stroking her thumb over his palm.

He led her way over to the end of the piers, past where any boats were docked, past really even where you could see light. "What are we doing here?" she whispered.

"Just taking a little break," he answered. He took a deep breath. This was something he had been putting off for some time. "Lulu...Remember that first morning you came over to my house?"

He heard her laugh softly. "Yeah. At the crack of dawn. How could I forget?"

"I never apologized...for the way I acted when you looked at that picture of Alex and Melissa."

Lulu had almost forgotten about that. "Cruz, why are you bringing this up now?"

"Because I want you to know why I acted the way I did," he sat down on the bench facing the water and she sat next to him.

"So that woman...Alex's wife is Melissa?"

"Yes," he answered. "Well...Was Melissa."

Lulu felt a sinking feeling in her belly. She knew where this story was going.

"Melissa wasn't just Alex's wife, she was one of my best friends growing up. Hell, she was even my girlfriend for about a minute and a half when we were twelve- she was the first girl I kissed. I introduced them," Lulu could hear a smile in his voice through the darkness. "And well, growing up we had all the same interests. She was like one of the guys, except hot. And we went into the academy together. She was my first partner when I became a cop in New York. I mean, we were all family." Now Lulu could hear the pain in his voice. "Melissa did an undercover stint, as a stripper. I knew it killed Alex, but he trusted me to protect her, and I swore I would."

Lulu's breath hitched. "As a stripper...So that night...At the Oasis..."

"God, Lulu, it was like living one of my worst memories all over again, seeing you up there," Cruz said, and he squeezed her hand tightly. "So anyway, there she was, getting groped and man-handled by the scum of the earth, all to find out where a little bit of cocaine in Brooklyn was coming from. And...somehow...God, I don't know how...someone found out she was a cop." Cruz went quiet after that, and Lulu knew what happened.

"Cruz," she said, touching his arm softly. "Why are you telling me this?"

He turned to her. Their vision had adjusted to the dark, and he looked her in the eye. "Because I really, really want you to tell me what is bothering you right now."

Lulu's stomach dropped. "What are you talking about? I was just...I was just worried about Liz and the baby, but everything's fine now-"

"Lulu," he said, stopping her. "It's me. Don't you know you can trust me by now?"

She was silent again, and the long minute stretched out for eternity. He didn't think she was going to answer him, until- "Elizabeth's baby...My little niece...She's supposed to be mine."

Cruz was confused. "What?"

Lulu looked at him. "Oh, I mean...Don't worry, I'm not going to go all Lifetime and steal my brother's baby or anything, it's just..." she took a deep breath. "This summer...I was pregnant."

Cruz let out a whoosh of breath. Whatever he had been expecting, it wasn't that. "You...you were pregnant...And you're clearly not now, so...What happened Lulu? Did you lose the baby?"

She laughed bitterly. "Lose the baby. Now there's a phrase for it. How do you _lose_ a baby? No, I didn't _lose_ the baby, I practically threw it away."

Cruz sighed. "You...you had an abortion?"

She didn't answer him. "I...If I had stayed pregnant, that baby would be born right around now, maybe even today," she said. She was looking out to the water, and lost in her own thoughts. "And seeing what Elizabeth went through tonight..." He heard her voice breaking. "Cruz, it could have been me. It could have been my baby."

Cruz exhaled. "Do you...wish it was?"

"I don't know," she said. "No. Yes." She let go of his hand, and held her face. She was shaking, and he heard her quiet little whimpers.

Cruz gently pulled her face up to look at him, and his heart almost stopped at what he saw. Tears were flowing freely down her face. Tears she had been holding in since he pulled her off the stage at the Oasis, glittering little drops tracking down her soft cheeks, blurring the brilliant blue of her eyes. And Cruz had no words for what this did to him. "Oh...Lulu...Baby...Don't cry," he said, taking her in his arms. It was a dangerous game he was playing. It was too easy, far too familiar to hold her close to his chest, his face buried in her silky golden hair. The scent of her was pure and fresh, like sunshine, and instantly rendered erotic when he felt her softness against him. She wrapped her own arms under his shoulders, nestling her head into his neck. He held her until the wracking sobs ebbed and tided over, and still he held her. "Shh, baby, shh," he whispered. He allowed himself to slip a little further, brushing his lips over her forehead.

"Cruz," she whimpered. "Cruz." He felt her placing small, soft kisses at the base of his throat, almost as if she didn't even realize she was doing it. He couldn't help it- he let his head fall back. When he felt her tongue lightly trace over the pulse where his neck met his jaw, it was her own undoing.

With a groan, he pulled her to him, his mouth finally descending on hers. He felt as though he had waited an eternity to kiss Lulu Spencer, and now that he finally had her in his arms, he was going to do it right. He brushed his lips back and forth across her own, just feeling the soft texture of that little rosebud mouth against his own. When he could torture himself no further with her breathy little sighs, he laved her mouth with his tongue. She tasted like peaches and cream, and decadent innocence that he had never dreamed of, and when she answered the probing question of his kiss with a shy flick of her own, he nearly pulled her under him and swore his lifelong allegiance right there.

Instead, he pulled her flush against him, running his hands through her hair and holding her tightly, and when she felt the evidence of how much she affected him, she gasped. It was enough to make him pull back, drawing ragged breaths. Lulu fell forward a little when he pulled back, her eyes still closed. Her lips were swollen and glistening, and her eyes were glazed over. Her eyes widened at him, and God, she looked about twelve years old.

"I'm," Cruz said, still breathing hard. "I'm sor..." He stood, dragging a hand through his hair. "I'll take you home, Lulu." He didn't reach for her this time. He didn't trust himself.

Her eyes went even wider, with something like anger mixed in, and she got up and walked past him, not even bothering to answer. Cruz sighed. She was beautiful, she was smart, she was far too terribly young for him. And it was a road that Cruz knew could have no good end. He'd been handed something pure once in his life, and he knew he did not deserve a second chance.

_music used in this section: The Last Night Of Not Knowing You (Darren Hanlon), So Are You To Me (Eastmountainsouth) and Hold You In My Arms (Ray LaMontagne)_


	6. Chapter 6

**AN:** Just to clarify, Maxie is one of my favorite characters...And 'Maxie' is Robyn Richards. She is the recipient of her cousin's heart and the legacy of Felicia and Frisco, not this nasty ho-beast going around calling herself Maxie that we see on our screen. Ahem. Anyways.

**Word Count: **2668

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_History shows there's not a chance in hell_

He didn't say a single word the entire car ride back to the Quartermaines. In comparison to his usual teasing and fighting about the radio station, the silence was a wall between them. Finally at the Quartermaines' driveway, Lulu turned to Cruz, to see if she'd get his usual crooked smile, his low, "See you later, Little Spencer."

But instead he just pulled the car in park and muttered, "I'm going to be busy with this case. I'll call you." He wouldn't even look at her.

_Don't cry, Lesley Lu_, she warned herself, stiffening her upper lip. Instead she got out of the car, slamming the door behind her.

She stomped up the driveway, the tears welling in her eyes quickly dried by hot anger. "I'll call you? _I'll call you?_ What the hell is that?" Lulu said to no one in particular. Cruz Rodriguez was pure whiplash. One moment, he was calling her 'Little Spencer' and treating her like a child, the next minute he was kissing her like...Oh God, that kiss. Would she ever be able to erase the memory of that kiss? That was definitely not the way someone kisses someone's little sister. It wasn't a kiss to make her feel better for crying like a baby over something that had happened ages ago. It certainly wasn't the way Dillon kissed her in the boathouse. That kiss was...From the bottom of a man's soul. And if she let herself, she could still feel her lips, her head, her entire body humming from the aftershocks of it.

Shaking those ridiculously romantic thoughts out of her head, Lulu reached around in her bag for her keys and eased open the front door of the Quartermaines mansion. It was almost 2 am, and she didn't want to wake anybody up. She needn't have worried. The house was pitch dark when she slipped in the front door, not a sound could be heard. Which made sense, Alice and the rest of the staff didn't need to be on duty until 5 so they were getting their rest.

But as for the rest of the family, everyone was sleeping in preparation for their busy days tomorrow at the hospital and ELQ. Dillon was surely resting up for finals. Lulu could remember a time when she and Dillon would stay up all night, watching old movies and talking about anything and nothing. Last summer, she had confused friendship for love- it had been so long since she had a friend her own age, outside of her family, and she had just latched onto the first boy who glanced her way. It was almost laughable now the way she had thrown herself at him. She had been close with Georgie and Maxie when they were younger- but different cliques in high school (or no clique in Lulu's case) had split them apart, and of course the affair between her father and Georgie's mother didn't help. But when...When she had become pregnant this summer, her old friend stood by her, in a way that no one else had. And they had tentatively buried the hatchet, especially since neither one really had any interest in Dillon any more.

Lulu headed up the winding staircase to her bedroom, careful to avoid the spots in the floor that she knew creaked. She didn't know why she was being so careful. It was clear that no one had been waiting up for her, no one cared where she had been all night. Every day was like this. Lulu was beginning to feel like she was invisible in the house she lived in. And maybe that was a feeling that was just too familiar to her. She had been invisible for years- her father ignored her, God she couldn't reach her mother, and her brothers, as much as she knew they loved her, had been involved in one disaster after another since they were teenagers. Disasters much graver than just a silly old teenage pregnancy, and she had always been hovering somewhere around second or lower on everyone else's priority lists.

With a dejected sigh as she entered her spacious, impersonal bedroom in the home of a family not her own, Lulu decided that all that was going to change. From now on, Lulu Spencer was her own top priority.

There was no sight more beautiful than the sight of the young Spencer family, all peering down into the face of their new day-old member, all nestled snugly in the loving arms of her mother. Lulu knocked quietly on Elizabeth's hospital room door, and the Spencers looked up.

"Auntie Lu!" Cameron said, running over and grabbing Lulu by the hand. "Look at her, isn't she awesome!" Lulu laughed as she allowed her nephew to pull her.

She looked down at little AJ. "Is she sleeping?"

"I think she's pondering the meaning of life," Elizabeth said with a smile. "AJ, look it's your auntie," she said, pulling back the blanket to show her baby's face.

Lulu's heart genuinely stopped. "Elizabeth...Lucky...Oh my God, she's beautiful." Little AJ was the tiniest baby she had ever seen, but absolutely pink and perfect, with one little blond curlicue sticking out in the center of her forehead.

"Yeah, we're ninety per cent sure we're going to keep her," Lucky said, with a wide grin. "All right, Cam. We're going to have to get you some lunch now, say goodbye to your sister." Lucky lifted Cameron so he could place a kiss on AJ's head, and then one on his mama's cheek. "We'll be back in about a half hour, ladies. Have a nice visit with your niece, little sis."

Cameron waved over Lucky's shoulder as they left the room, and Lulu took the seat next to Elizabeth. "Do you want to hold her?" Elizabeth asked.

"Sure," Lulu said, taking her into her hands. She was so tiny. She fit from head to rump lying right across Lulu's palms. "Hi AJ. I'm your Auntie Lulu. When you get big enough I'll teach you the entire Spencer bag of tricks."

"That will be never," Elizabeth cooed winking at Lulu, and she laughed.

"And I brought you a present," Lulu said, nodding over to the little giftbag she had left next to Elizabeth. Elizabeth opened it up to see a frilly, lacey little dress with pink flowers on it and a matching hat and booties.

Elizabeth laughed. "This has to be the cutest thing I've ever seen."

Lulu grinned. "Hopefully, it will really embarrass her in about fifteen years." Lulu took a deep breath, ready to reveal her selfish reasons for coming to the hospital today. "Elizabeth, I need to ask you a favor."

"Sure, Lulu," Elizabeth said. "But just know I can't be doing any heavy lifting or bank robberies for a while."

Lulu laughed. "Nothing like that. Um, Elizabeth...Do you have any plans for using your old studio any time soon?"

Elizabeth shrugged. "Unfortunately, I don't think I'm going to have much time for painting any time in the near future. Why do you ask?"

Lulu bit her lip. "Well...I'm asking because...Living at the Quartermaines is...Well, it's not working out..."

"You want to live there?" Elizabeth asked, surprised. "Well, sure, no problem."

Lulu had expected to have to give more of a reasoning. "Really? Just like that?"

"Of course just like that," Elizabeth smiled. "You're family. If you need it, it's yours."

"Oh my God, thank you Elizabeth!" Lulu grinned. "I...I don't have a job now, but I'll get one, and I can pay you rent-"

"You don't have to pay me rent," Elizabeth shook her head. "Like I said, Lulu, you're family. But...you will have to figure out a way to pay the electric bill on your own."

"Of course, I can do that," Lulu said. She was going to have to take Mrs. Santini up on that job she had been offering for months after all.

So Lulu passed her finals, and moved into Elizabeth's old art studio without the Quartermaines so much as looking up as she left their house. She started working the night-shift at Carmen's and spent her days visiting Elizabeth and AJ.

Besides it being the only place that would hire her other than Kelley's, Lulu had it in the back of her mind that even though he was avoiding her like the plague, she would see Cruz often enough at Carmen's, but she was wrong. In a month's time, he only came in once for a quick cup of coffee and did a double-take when he saw her. So it seemed he wasn't there to check up on her.

"Lula! The detective! Go take his order," Mrs. Santini said to her, nodding in his direction.

Lulu hesitated. She was a crafty old lady, that Mrs. Santini. She took a deep breath and slowly walked over to his table. "Hi, Cruz."

"So, you're, uh...really working here now?" he said, fidgeting with the sugar bowl, and doing his best to make a big show of not actually looking at her.

"Yeah, I moved out of the Quartermaines, so..." Lulu let her voice trail off. "So, I'm living in Elizabeth's old art studio now."

"Oh, that's...That's good. How do you like it?"

"It's nice. I have some privacy," Lulu answered, trying not to be disappointed that he wasn't seeking her out. He had kissed her like he would die without her, and now he seemed intent on ignoring her. Well, that was just fine. "Can I get you anything?"

"Um, yeah, the usual, to go," Cruz said, still looking away from her.

Rolling her eyes, Lulu walked away, taking her time putting his cappuccino on. When she finally brought it back over to his table, she practically dropped the cup in front of him. "Mrs. Santini says it's on the house," she muttered, and tried to turn away as quickly as she had come, but he reached a hand out and gripped her wrist.

"Lulu, wait," she stopped but didn't look at him. Lulu was holding her breath. "Sorry I haven't called lately. I've got this case, it's taking almost all of my...Never mind. Anyway, I'm glad I saw you here."

At that, Lulu turned to him. "Really?"

"Yeah, I found something out..._about Rick Webber_," he whispered the last part, and Lulu tried not to feel a twinge of disappointment. One step closer to proving her mother's innocence was a _good_ thing.

"What did you find?"

"Well, not exactly about Webber," Cruz said, finally looking her in the eye. This- investigating- was safe territory for them. Comfortable, easy. "I've come across some findings on the Cassadines...Their activities in 2002, it's...It's a little...suspicious."

"Well, that's no news," Lulu slid into the table across from him. "What happened?"

"Look, this could mean nothing, but there's been reports of seeing Mikkos Cassadine, the grandfather, in 2002, long after he was supposed to be dead," Cruz said. "Four sightings to be exact."

"Well, my dad always said that the Cassadines were vampires," Lulu shrugged. "Maybe he wasn't too far off. Mikkos, really, you sure?"

"Well," Cruz shook his head. "That's the thing, I'm _not_ sure. No photographs and no witnesses to seeing him, just some fishy checks and word of mouth."

"Well, that's a starting point though. We need to look into this more," Lulu said, hopefully. "I...I get out of work at ten, maybe after-"

"Oh no, Lulu, I can't," he said. Too quickly. "I...I got this other case I'm working on, I really need to go right back to work."

"Oh," Lulu said, rising from the table. "Um, sure you do, sorry. Okay, um, thanks for telling me, I'll try to figure something out."

"Lulu, I'm..." Cruz looked back down to the table and stood. He looked back up to her. "Good luck, I'll...I'll call you."

And Lulu knew better than to believe him this time, but she tried for a weak smile as he left. "I won't hold my breath," she whispered to his retreating back.

The rest of her shifts were fairly uneventful, until about a week after Cruz came in, Lulu saw a face she had never expected (or wanted) to see again. Frank Boudreauz.

She was working behind the counter when he came in, but there was no mistaking that he saw her across the room. He didn't even have to speak to her to her for chills to run up her spine, he just merely tipped his hat to her and leered and she was back at New Year's Eve. Which, once again, made her think of Cruz.

And she wasn't going there again.

Soon it was nearly summer and AJ was six weeks old. Lulu was watching the baby while Elizabeth got supper ready, when Cameron and Lucky came home, with Cam holding a red boogie board over his head. "Auntie Lu! Look what I got!"

"Cool, buddy!" Lulu grinned at him and he smiled back. He had recently lost his two front teeth and was proud after she told him how tough it made him look.

"I'm bringing it to the beach party!"

"Cool, buddy, is it with your friends from school," Lulu asked, placing AJ in her chair.

"Oh, it's uh, it's not a kid party," Lucky said, smiling and waving as he passed his baby girl.

"Yeah, it's _so_ cool," Cameron said, hopping up on one of the dining table chairs. "Hi AJ!"

"What's so cool?" Lulu asked. "Cam, go wash up for dinner before you play with your sister."

He ran off, leaving his boogie board leaning against the table, passing Lucky who was drying off his hands and reaching for AJ. "Memorial Day, the PCPD has an annual barbecue up in Montauk. With the way the heat has been, it's definitely going to be an all day beach affair," Lucky said cradling his daughter against his chest.

"Oh," Lulu said, trying for casual. "The, uh, whole department goes?"

"Yeah, pretty much, it's a great time," Lucky answered. "And all their families too. They really do it up right, Mac rents a big house right on the beach, and anyone who wants to can stay there, and he's got a buddy up there who gives him a deal on jet-skis and a boat, and...And well, Cam had so much fun last year we almost had to leave him up there." Cameron laughed, and climbed up onto Lucky's lap leaning over and staring at his baby sister. He did that a lot. Elizabeth said he was planning different ways to use her as a football.

Lulu raised an eyebrow. "Elizabeth, are you going too?"

"Oh yeah!" She answered, entering from the kitchen carrying the chicken platter. "Trust me, Lulu, I am about _starved_ to get out of this house. There's a couple of other young moms with babies, we'll hang out on the deck together under plenty of shade. And Robin Scorpio and Patrick Drake are going to be there, and they have been just begging to see little AJ here. I'm thinking that they're...you know..." Elizabeth winked conspiratorially at Lulu.

Lulu took a deep breath. "Sounds fun. Maybe, I'll go." She had _no_ shame.

"Really?" Lucky looked up from AJ for a second, still holding out his finger for her to grip. "You never wanted to go before."

"I never knew about it before!" Lulu protested. "And it sounds like fun, a boat and hanging out on the beach, the café is closed that weekend...Maxie and Georgie will be there. It sounds fun," she said. Again.

"Well, of course, you're always welcome," Lucky said.

"Great, then it's settled," Lulu said, sitting down at the dinner table, and helping Cam cut up his meat. She repeated over and over in her head that this beach party business had everything to do with wanting to just have a relaxing day in the sun and nothing with flaunting herself in a bikini in front of Cruz Rodriguez. Nothing at all.

_music used in this section: Pavlov's Bell (Aimee Mann)_


	7. Chapter 7

**Word Count: **3001

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_Suppose I never ever let you kiss me so sweet and so soft_

Lulu checked through her beach bag one more time as she heard Lucky honking downstairs. She waved out the window to let them know she was coming down, and took one last look in the mirror, opening up her white cover up to take a look at herself. Was she being silly? She'd taken out of her bills money to purchase all new clothes for the day: bathing suit, sandals, cover up, shades, even stuff to put on later in the day.

No, she was just going to the beach with her family to hang out with friends, and get some sun on her day off. She had every right to treat herself a little. She took a deep breath and grabbed her bag and ran downstairs.

"Wow, look at you!" Elizabeth said, turning around from the front seat. "New stuff, huh? Let me see your bathing suit, what color is it?"

"It's, uh...red," Lulu said, slipping on her sunglasses, and blatantly ignoring her sister-in-law's request. Traffic was light and they shot up to Montauk fairly quickly, playing a modified version of the license plate game, since Cam couldn't read everything yet. He just picked out different colors and styles.

By the time they got up to the beach house, the party was in full swing. Cars already lined the streets and Robin Scorpio and Patrick Drake pulled up at the exact same time, and Robin just about squealed over AJ, and Patrick helped Lucky bring in his family's assorted stuff, which included a small cooler with snacks, drinks and food Elizabeth had packed to help out Felicia, a net full of sand toys for Cameron, a playpen, an umbrella, a diaper bag, two beach bags, and three chairs. "Do you guys need some help?" Lulu asked, slinging her own light bag over her shoulder.

"No...We...Got it," Lucky grunted, struggling under his burdens. Cameron 'helped' by dragging a shovel out of his toy net, to lighten the load.

"Lulu!" Maxie Jones called out, running down from the house with Georgie, and Lulu was 'attacked' by two giddy teenaged girls throwing their arms around her. "So glad you could make it this year!"

"Yeah, um me too," Lulu answered brightly.

"Come on, you can dump your stuff in our room, and then we'll head down to the beach," Georgie pulled Lulu's hand into the house.

Cruz had seen Lucky pull up and almost dropped the cooler he was carrying when he'd seen Lulu get out of the car, holding Cam's hand. She was in some sort of flowy white cover-up thing that swirled around her thighs and parted across her chest revealing a generous swell of soft curves. He knew he couldn't put off saying hello to them forever...But that didn't stop him from dilly-dallying with the coolers on the deck.

"Hey partner, there you are!" He almost winced when he heard Lucky's voice across the deck. Cruz turned to see Lucky and Cam crossing over to talk to him and almost sighed before putting on a big smile. "Why don't you come on inside, I've got someone I've wanted you to meet."

Cruz nodded, his face almost cracking from smiling so wide as Lucky led him into the house where Elizabeth was setting up some of the kids' stuff at a little 'mommy station' that Felicia had created for all the moms with young kids. "Look AJ!" she cooed to her daughter. "Cruz, we've been telling AJ all about you and she's just been dying to meet you."

"She has?" Cruz asked, leaning close over the tiny little girl.

"Yeah, we told her that Mommy and Daddy would still be frozen to the living room floor if Cruz Rodriguez hadn't moved us along to the doctor so our AJ could get here," Lucky said, lifting AJ out of her carseat. "You wanna hold her?"

"Oh no," Cruz shook his head. He didn't think he'd ever held a baby younger than a year old and he couldn't even remember when that was.

"Oh come on, you've got to," Lucky said, already arranging her in his hands. "Just hold her head and under her butt."

Cruz was doing that but little AJ was still fussing. "Shh, um, it's okay..." Cruz whispered, but AJ still squirmed and he could see a squall building up in her lungs. "Lucky, maybe you should-"

"Lucky! Can you come out here please!" Elizabeth called from the deck already having to break up the first shoving match of the day between Cameron and another little boy.

"Lucky, what am I supposed to do-" and just as her father left her sight, AJ let out a weak little cry, her little face scrunched up, and Cruz momentarily panicked and looked around, but all the other mommy types were occupied with their own children or getting food out in the kitchen. "Shh, shh, don't cry, _querida_, shh..."

"You've got to cuddle her." It was that voice that Cruz had been half dreading, half holding his breath to hear for the past two weeks, ever since Lucky had casually mentioned that his sister was coming. He lifted his gaze from the floor traveling all the way up the length of her tanned, bare legs, and with a hard swallow finally looked Lulu in the eye for the first time in almost a month.

God, she was beautiful. In some ways this was worse than seeing her up on that stage New Year's Eve. Now she was practically naked, and he was in a room filled with everyone he knew, including her family and holding her baby niece in his arms, and he still wanted to back her up against a wall and just rip that scrap of nothing from her body. "Huh?"

"You've got to...She likes to be held close," Lulu said, re-arranging AJ in his arms, placing her head in the crook of his elbow and tucked his other arm around the baby's butt and thighs. "Yeah, like that. Just cuddle her into your chest, see?" The baby had settled right down, and now she was looking curiously up at him, and he could almost see the beginnings of a smile on her face. She sure was a little looker.

"Yeah, you're a natural, Cruz," Lulu said, and he looked up and she winked at him. She actually winked, and Cruz knew he was in trouble.

"Yeah look at that, she likes you," Lucky said, strolling back with a chastened Cameron in his arms.

"You ready to go down to the beach?" Georgie said, the Jones sisters flanking Lulu on either side.

"Um yeah," Lulu allowed herself to be pulled along, glancing over her shoulder at her brother, Cam, and Cruz. Cruz was sitting down and really getting comfortable with AJ in his arms and Lulu was afraid that if she kept watching him be all cute, she was going to sit next to him all day and stare like some drippy freshman girl mooning over the senior quarterback.

"Oh my God, I think I've died and gone to Heaven," Danny Jenkins was leaning over the railing next to Bobby Jamison and standing far too close to Cruz at the grill. Everyone had to take a turn at the grill or playing bartender or lifeguarding the kids on the beach. Teamwork, it was what Mac preached at the station and with his family too.

"What are you babbling about now, Jenkins?" Cruz muttered as he methodically flipped burgers and turned hot dogs.

"Blond down there. Red bikini," Jenkins drooled, and Cruz's eyes snapped to attention where he knew Lulu was rubbing lotion up and down her arms and languorously stretching her legs out in the sun. She was worse than any Playboy pin-up, and Cruz had a feeling she knew it.

"My god..." he said again, this time with an emphatic thrust of his hips, and Cruz couldn't take it any more and smacked him up the backside of the head.

"Owww," Jenkins whined. "What was that for? Ow!" He yelped as he got another smack, this time from Lucky.

"That was for acting like a friggin' dog about my _baby sister_," Lucky answered, crossing his arms over his chest so that his biceps bulged.

"Oh Lucky, I uh, didn't know," Jenkins stammered.

"Yeah and that goes for you, too, Jamison," Lucky said pointedly to an awed Bobby Jamison, who hadn't said a word.

"Oh, I, um..." he sputtered.

"That, guys," Lucky said, slapping his hand around Cruz's shoulders. "That is how you look out for your partner. You don't let anyone talk about the women in his life like that."

"It's uh...no problem," Cruz mumbled. _I kissed your sister like my life depended on it._

"Yeah, buddy," Lucky said, striding away to help Cam build a sand castle.

"Oh my God, who's that other blonde, and the other one with the rack," Jenkins had moved onto new prey.

"The commissioner's daughters," Cruz said. "Don't even think about it." Down on the beach, Lulu turned onto her stomach and reached behind her to untie her bikini top, and Cruz almost passed out. It was official- she was trying to kill him.

Lulu tried to relax in the sun, tried to half-heartedly keep up with Maxie and Georgie's gossip about PCU, but her whole body was humming because she knew Cruz Rodriguez was iglaring/i at her from the deck. Even turning onto her belly didn't help. What was his problem? She felt like the plague. _Doesn't matter. You're not here for him, you're here for-_

"Auntie Lu!" Cam called from the shoreline. "Look at me!" Lucky had showed him how to slide his boogie board along the wet sand and he was getting pretty good at it.

"Good job, buddy!" She shouted, being careful to hold her towel over her breasts as she leaned up.

"Hey Dad! When can we take the boat out?" Georgie called up to Mac on the deck.

"Yeah, it's almost low tide," Maxie chimed in, and then turned to Lulu. "At low tide, there's a big sand bar a couple hundred yards in. You get better sun out there, and a little more _privacy_," she said, nodding towards the deck and waggling her eyebrows.

"I've got my hands full up here," he answered, then turned to his boys. "Any of you up for driving the boat?"

"I can!" Danny Jenkins piped up.

"I don't think so, rookie," Mac said. "You've never done it before, but...Cruz? You drove the boat some last year didn't you?"

Cruz had been purposely looking away from Mac. It was all too much- being close to her but not really being allowed to be anywhere near her. "Yeah," he answered.

"Well, you wanna take the kids out on the boat?"

_Great. Now I'm the goddamn chaperone._

But one couldn't exactly refuse the commissioner. "Sure."

Danny Jenkins and Bobby Jamison were already on their way down to the pontune, along with Stevie Martinez to join the three teenaged girl on the boat. He'd be the oldest guy by at least six years. _Wonderful._

The beauty of a pontune, Lulu noticed was that you could get just as wet as if you were actually swimming in the ocean. It was more like a big raft, and one of the guys kept the cooler safe and dry, and the girls just bounced along the back of the boat, enjoying the wind and the spray.

The only person who didn't seem to be enjoying himself was Cruz. He was driving the boat like he was an elementary school busdriver. Stiff, and unsmiling, and so very unlike the kind, funny detective she thought she knew.

Well, that was just too bad. There was no reason to ruin her day off just because he wanted to keep that perpetual scowl on his face. She turned to the boy sitting next to her- Danny was his name- and smiled. It was too loud to really talk but he grinned back. He was ikind of/i cute, though his boyish blond good looks seemed washed out when she looked back up at Cruz and the dark brilliance of his eyes, the warm golden tone to his skin.

Lulu sighed and sat back, closing her eyes to the sun's rays. It was hopeless. She had to be honest with herself and just admit that she had come here for Cruz- she missed him.

When they reached the sandbar, the boys hopped off and secured the boat and Maxie and Georgie hopped off too, to continue their day of frying in the sun. "You coming, Lulu?" Maxie called.

"I'm comfortable," she mumbled, still stretched out on one of the benches lining the perimeter of the boat. She half-opened one eye, and the girls shrugged and made for the sand.

Lulu turned her head. Cruz was still sitting in the driver's seat. Not looking at her, but not making any move to get off the boat. Lulu looked closer. His knuckles were pale where they tightly gripped the steering wheel. She cleared her throat. "Hey, Detective."

He sighed and looked down at her. "Hey, Lulu." And then he turned his gaze back to the ocean.

"God, it's like pulling teeth, isn't it?" Lulu huffed, sitting up.

"What is?" Cruz said, dragging a hand through his hair. He only did that when he was aggravated- or nervous.

"Can you even _look_ at me?" Lulu said, her voice rising, and he did turn to her.

"Keep your voice down," he said, leaning close, and Lulu saw the hot anger in his eyes.

Now she looked away, curling her knees into her chest. "What am I supposed to think, Cruz? I haven't seen you since the night AJ was born-"

"I saw you at Carmen's that night."

"Yeah, and you couldn't get out of there fast enough!" Lulu glanced over the side of the boat, but the rest of their company was busy sunning and flirting on the beach. "You know...I saw Frank Boudreauz at the café one night."

He did know. He knew every night she was at the café, making it a point to go in and talk to her- grab her and kiss her again- every night, but every night, he would chicken out. And when he'd seen Frank Boudreauz exiting Carmen's that night, and then glanced in the window to see Lulu taking shaky breaths, he'd followed the bastard around the corner and slammed his fat face against the wall. Police brutality his ass._ "Don't you ever go in there again. You ever see that girl, you cross the street. You never even think of her."_

But he didn't tell her any of that. "He's not going to bother you again. He's behind bars, for good this time."

She raised an eyebrow. "Didn't you have him behind bars before?"

Cruz sighed and sat next to her. This was always easy between them- detectiving, good guys and bad guys. "We got a direct connection between him and a teenage overdose- she had worked for him at the Oasis, and she was only seventeen. Her uncle was a Barrington. The lawyer could run circles around anyone on Sonny Corinthos' payroll."

"Sonny, really?" Lulu asked.

Cruz shrugged. "We couldn't make the connection, but everyone knows. Everyone always knows. At least it's one less scumbag on the street, it's all we can ever ask for." He turned to Lulu. "I know that Sonny was a friend of your dad's when you were younger, but make no mistake, Little Spencer, he's a bad man. Don't ever ask him for help, don't ever go to him for a favor..."

"I know, I know," Lulu said, covering his hand with hers. The last thing she needed was another 'dad' lecture from him. "Is that why you were so busy?"

He nodded. "Yeah. Had to get him off the street. I was sick of looking at all these pictures of dead teenagers." He didn't add that it kept him awake at night, worrying that she might be next. Not that she was stupid enough to get involved with that junk, but god, anyone could ever slip something in her drink. He tapped her on the nose. "I...I know that proving your mother's innocence is important. I wouldn't abandon you on that, and...I believe in it. I won't let her stay labeled as a murderer."

Lulu granted him a slow, sweet smile, that he hadn't seen since the night that he'd taught her how to shoot his gun, and his heart almost stopped. "Thanks, Detective," she said. "I thought...I thought you might have been avoiding me, because...Because, well..."

Cruz swallowed hard. He was hoping she wouldn't go there. Things were complicated enough as they were. But he wouldn't leave her twisting in the wind, not again. "Because I kissed you?"

She shyly averted her eyes, and god when she did that, her eyelashes just fluttered over her cheekbones, and she looked like the prettiest, most delicate little thing he'd ever seen. "Well, afterwards, you...You didn't seem to want to think about it."

"I haven't been able to _stop_ thinking about it."

Lulu's eyes snapped up to his, and she could see all the passion and resolve of a _man_ in his eyes. "Cruz, I-"

"Lulu, are you ever going to get down here?" Maxie called from the beach.

"Go on, Little Spencer" he said, with a crooked grin. "We'll talk later."

She rose and slowly headed off the boat, looking back at him, but he just smiled and tipped his finger over his forehead in a mock salute. _God, that was sexy. Like something out of a Carey Grant movie._

And Cruz leaned back, watching her leave the boat. He reached into the cooler and cracked a beer open. There was almost no point in fighting Little Lulu Spencer. She would always get the better of him.

_music used in this section: I Know (Tegan & Sara) & Fidelity (Regina Spekter)_


	8. Chapter 8

**Word Count: **4271

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_I've always been a dreamer, I hide my head among the clouds_

_Now that I'm coming down, won't you be my solid ground?_

The day passed quickly, as good times so often do. Cruz and Martinez took the boat back to the house and returned with another full crew, including Lucky, Cameron, Patrick Drake and Robin Scorpio. Lulu hung out with the girls and got a _very_ impressive tan, if she said so herself, and showed Cameron how to build a 'creepy castle' by drizzling the wet sand at the shoreline from his closed fist to create all sorts of weird parapets and towers.

All day long though, she snuck little sneaking glances at Cruz, and whenever she did, their eyes met. Sometimes he would look away quickly, but if Lucky and Patrick and the other guys were occupied with discussing Mets vs. Yankees, or golf, or anything else, Cruz would look back at her and smile and wink, and Lulu's insides would turn to mush.

When the sandbar disappeared in the later part of the afternoon, the party resumed on the boat, everyone hanging out and still enjoying the sun and the breeze. Maxie tried to sneak a few beers to the back of the boat for herself and Georgie and Lulu, but Robin put a stop to that. And when it was time for them to make their way back to the house, Lulu unsteadily walked to the front of the boat, plunking herself down next to Cruz. "Can I drive?"

"Yeah, let her, man," Lucky called from where he was helping Cameron secure his life jacket. "She did it about a thousand times when we were younger."

Cruz glanced over his shoulder. "Sure, partner, if you say so," and his hand trailed over her hip as they switched positions, and Lulu jumped slightly at the electricity of him just touching her. She grinned at him, and he smiled back.

"All right, guys, hang on to your hats," Lulu said, revving up the engine.

"I'm not wearing a hat," Cameron said, puzzled.

Lulu laughed and pulled back on the motor, and with a whoop of excitement brought them back to the house, adding in some bounces in the water for Cameron's enjoyment.

Back at the house, Lucky took AJ off Elizabeth's hands for a little bit so she could eat with Cameron and Lulu, and they stuffed themselves on grilled, chicken, steak tips, and ribs from Eli's that Mac had catered. Cameron was chattering excitedly to his mom about the boat and everything he'd done that day, but Lulu could see that Elizabeth was getting tired, and she felt guilty for not helping out with AJ more that day. "Elizabeth, are you okay?" she asked.

"Oh yeah, I'm fine," Elizabeth answered. "It's just been a long day and a lot of sun. We're going to have to get these kids home pretty soon after we eat."

"Oh," Lulu said, trying to keep the disappointment out of her face. Of course they had to leave, she couldn't expect and Elizabeth and two little kids stay there all night just so she might steal a private moment with Cruz Rodriguez.

"Hey, you're not leaving, are you?" Maxie said, as she walked by. "Why don't you stick around for the beach party later? Me and Georgie can drive you home tomorrow."

Lulu smiled and almost threw her arms around her old friend. "Do you care, Elizabeth?"

Elizabeth shook her head. "As long as you can get home, that's cool."

Lucky came out of the house with a sleeping AJ in his arms. "Princess AJ has been fed, burped, diaper and clothing changed. You wanna take her back, Mama?"

"Sure, come here, baby girl," Elizabeth cradled her daughter in her arms. "Your sister's going to stay the night with Maxie and Georgie."

"Yeah, Maxie said she'd drive me home later on," Lulu added.

"Oh yeah, sure that's fine," Lucky said. "Oh, and hey, you could probably get a ride from Cruz too, if you want. He lives right by you now, did you know that?"

She did know that. "Oh no, I didn't know." Dinner was winding down and Mac and the cops were quickly and quietly clearing the deck of garbage and putting food away inside. Lulu noticed how Mac really made sure that the wives and families were enjoying themselves and had a pretty good system to make sure each cop did his part. And as the deck was cleared, the guys on the force headed down to the beach, where another team of cops had built up a bonfire as the sun began to set.

"What's going on?" Lulu asked Maxie.

"Come on, follow me," Maxie said, running back into the house. Lulu followed her up the stairs to the bedroom Maxie and Georgie and Robin shared, where Lulu had dumped her stuff earlier. Georgie was waiting out on the small balcony that looked directly onto the beach. "Mac does this every year," Maxie said. "He pulls all the guys onto the beach and gives a toast. It's hilarious. It's the only time we get to see them all being really mushy together. Some of them even cry."

Lulu quieted down and leaned far over the railing to listen.

"It's been another year, guys," Mac said. Bobby Jamison and Terry Fraser were circling the crowd handing out shots of Remy Martin. "It's been a good year, and it's been a bad year. We lost a brother this year. But he died with courage, the way he would have wanted it and we are here to carry on his legacy. One of the biggest successes of our department this year was bringing down Frank Boudreauz and the Oasis, and for good this time. That place has been a thorn in our side for over fifteen years, and I know that for all of us who have daughters, sisters, girlfriends, we all sleep safer at night," Mac paused. "You guys know I'm always preaching teamwork, and we couldn't have gotten Boudreauz or any other case without contributions from each and every one of you, but I think we all know that there were two very key players," Mac said, smiling in the general direction of Lucky and Cruz. " I'd like to ask the two guys who were most crucial to come on up here with me." Lucky and Cruz joined the commissioner amidst much cheering and back-slapping. "You guys have anything to add?"

"Um, well, I'd love to say that I taught this guy everything he knows," Lucky said, slinging an arm around Cruz's neck. "But that would be a lie. Um, Cruz, man what can I say? You're more than my partner, you're my brother and my friend. I couldn't ask for a better man to be watching my back."

Lulu had a lump in her throat from watching the outpouring of emotion between her brother and Cruz. She knew it was a sacred bond, between two policemen, but to see it so up close and personally was quite touching.

Cruz hugged Lucky back. "You're one of the best, Spencer."

Mac raised his shot and the rest of the guys followed suit. "To the PCPD. May the good guys win and the bad guys lose, and to making our city and the world a better place."

"_To serve and protect!"_ The force saluted.

After the policemen's toast, Lulu said goodbye to Lucky and Elizabeth and the kids, and went up to use Maxie and Georgie's shower. She rinsed her bathing suit and hung it up to dry and then put on her other cover-up, which she had specifically bought for that day, knowing it would be comfortable after a lot of sun. It was black gauchos in think cotton, that connected to a low-waisted, loose tube top, all in one garment. She scrunched her hair to bring out her natural curls, and joined Maxie and Georgie, also both freshly showered out on the balcony. "Here, pull up a chair," Maxie said. She mixed them pomegranate martinis and served them in dixie cups.

Mac and the guys on the force who had stayed were still lounging around the deck, telling glory stories and talking sports. Lulu looked down at Cruz. He had changed too, into jeans and a white tee shirt, and she had never realized how much such a simple, staple wardrobe could be the sexiest look in the world.

"So, who do you think, Georgie?" Maxie asked, and Lulu turned back to the girls.

"What are we talking about?" Lulu asked.

"Hottest guy on the force," Georgie answered. "And then we'll do the hospital, and then PCU, and then..."

Lulu laughed. Maxie's drinks were _strong_.

"So, who do you think, Georgie?" Maxie asked again.

"Ummm," Georgie looked down at the guys laughing and talking on the deck. "Bobby Jamison. I think he's sweet. And also...Lucky."

"Oh yeah, Lucky," Maxie agreed.

"_Gross_, you guys," Lulu laughed.

"So, Lulu...Your turn," Georgie said.

Lulu hadn't been able to take her eyes off Cruz. Though they'd shared some wonderful, torturous, long looks that day, no opportunity had presented itself for them to be alone. It seemed she would have to create that opportunity. "I would have to say...None of them really hold my interest," she rose, drink still in her hand, and walked back inside to head downstairs.

"Where are you going?" Maxie asked.

"Down to the beach," Lulu answered, not turning around.

"Lulu, it's dark out," Georgie protested.

"I just need some air- strong drink, Maxie, I'll be fine. There's about thirty guys down there, if I need help, I'll scream," and Lulu skipped down the stairs before either one of them could protest further.

Cruz was no fool. He had seen Lulu practically sashay down onto the beach, and he knew that _she_ knew he saw her. In that ridiculous little...whatever it was that pooled around her legs and clung to her thighs and nipples whenever the ocean breeze blew against her. She had unobtrusively snuck onto the deck a few hours ago with Maxie and swiped a bottle of vodka and some mixers from the bar Mac set up. He chose not to make a big deal about it- it was a family party after all, and no one was driving anywhere. But down on the beach, the girly pink drink still in her hand, he saw her swaying slightly. Cruz looked around the deck, but most everyone was involved in the favorite topic of Yankees baseball, and being the Mets fan that he was, Cruz decided to stretch his legs for a bit on the beach.

He found her past the dunes, about a hundred yards off, by a little rocky area that put them oh-so-conveniently out of sight from the house. "Hey Detective," she smiled up at him, only slightly bleary-eyed. She held out her cup. "Want some?"

She was sitting on a nice flat rock, with her chin resting on her knees and he dropped down next to her, stretching his legs out in front of him. He took a sip from her cup, and grimaced. "God, how do you drink that? It's so sweet."

She laughed. "I thought it was strong." She turned her head towards him, pillowing her cheek on her hands. "And it's better than whatever you were drinking on the deck. What was that?"

"Tequila," he answered, taking another tiny sip of that god-awful pink drink and handing it back to her.

"Mmm," she smiled, closing her eyes. "Tequila and lime. I always loved the smell of that- it reminds me of my dad."

He chuckled low. "I don't know how I'm supposed to take that." He curled his knees up and rested his cheek on his hands, mimicking her position. Their heads were very, very close. He reached out a hand and traced the white line in her golden skin where her bikini strap had been. He had always loved tan lines on girls- like the bare skin wasn't meant to be exposed, and looking at it was almost...forbidden. "You got some sun today, Little Spencer."

"So did you. Your cheeks are pink."

"I'm Puerto Rican, baby. We don't get pink."

She laughed. "Well," she reached out a hand and placed her palm over his upturned cheek, stroking her thumb up and down. "Your cheeks...are...pink." And she giggled again at her own cleverness. His skin was so very warm.

Cruz closed his own hand over hers and turned his head to press a soft kiss to the center of her palm. Lulu's eyes closed and she gave a little sigh, and his lips traveled further, brushing over the inside of her wrist. His tongue darted out to lick at her pulse-point and she moaned.

Cruz swallowed hard and pressed another small kiss to her hand, pulling their intertwined fingers down between them, but still holding on tight. She opened her eyes and smiled at him. God, she was so sweet. And _young_. And so damn innocent- even though she would probably kill him if he said that out loud to her. He shouldn't have been touching her. He ireally/i shouldn't have been kissing her. But through his tequila haze, in the moonlight, the waves crashing up agains the rocks beneath them...He didn't care.

"What are you doing out here?" he asked.

She shrugged. "Guess I just wanted to be alone for a little bit."

He raised an eyebrow. "So...am I...intruding?"

She laughed. "No...What are_ you_ doing out here?"

He grinned. "I guess I just wanted to be alone for a little bit, too."

She grinned back. "Interesting...So...Am _I_ intruding?"

He shook his head, still smiling. "Nope." They both laughed and he reluctantly let go of her hand, standing up. She stayed seated on the ground, peering up at him from under stubby black lashes. Those eyes...Those blue, blue eyes of hers. Cruz felt like he could see all of the joy and the beauty of the world in her eyes. "Come on, Lulu. We should go back to the house. It's getting late."

"Aw, Cruz, I don't _wanna_," she fake-whined and giggled. She held out her hands, palm-side down. "Help me up." Grasping her hands, he pulled her to her feet. She fell into him, laughing softly into his chest, and looping her arms around his neck and over his shoulder to steady herself.

Cruz's arms encircled her waist and he rested her cheek against her soft hair, breathing in her scent. Peaches and cream and Lulu Spencer. She was so soft all over- smooth, baby soft skin; silky soft hair against his face; soft, pretty smiles; soft blue eyes and long, soft eyelashes fluttering against his neck. Cruz growled, a low rumble in the base of his throat. "Sweetheart," he swallowed. "I _really_ want to kiss you again."

Lulu tilted her head back and looked at him, all wide-eyed innocence and sincere hope. "Please?"

He sighed and pressed his lips to her forehead. "You," he kissed the tip of her nose. "You don't have to ask, sweetheart." And he kissed both of her cheeks before finally cupping her face in his hands and looking into her eyes- those blue, blue eyes, the eyes that held all of the joy and the beauty of the world- for a minute (an eternity) before he could take it no more and so, so softly pressed his mouth to hers. So soft it was hardly even like touching at all.

He was kissing her so slowly, so luxuriously tasting her that Lulu almost felt frozen, or she would have were it not for the heat streaming from her belly to every extension of her body, fingertips, toes and most especially between her legs. And when his hands left her face to trail down the hollows of her throat, across her collarbone and down her shoulder to the inside of her elbow, his lips followed everywhere his fingers touched, kissing and nibbling and- _god, sucking_. He slide his hands over her hips, around the small of her back and down, filling his hands with her pleasingly flared bottom. So soft. Everywhere a man would want to touch. He pulled her into the hard cradle of his thighs and leaned back against the tall, flat rock behind him. "Lulu," he finally said, breaking their kiss and breathing hard.

"Cruz," she replied, a strain of a whimper caught in her throat. She wrapped an arm around the back of his head and dragged him down to rest forehead to forehead against her. His eyes were heavy-lidded, and so dark they were almost black. He pulled her tighter against him and she gasped when she felt his arousal, pulsing and rock hard, between them. Lulu kissed him again, too feverish and frenzied to keep his slow pace.

"Lulu," he said, between kisses. "Slow down...Sweetheart...I can't...I can't take it..."

"Cruz," she moaned, before sucking his lower lip between her teeth and nibbling lightly. She trailed soft kisses up his jaw, before flicking his earlobe with her tongue and whispering, _"Please."_

"_Dios," _he groaned, and Lulu gasped as he lifted her straight off her feet. She locked her legs around his back and held on for dear life, but he had complete control over her. He was kissing her with a new passion and greed- dizzying, _possessive_, heart-stopping kisses. Lulu had no idea that the word 'please' from her lips could unleash such a raw, primal _need_ from him.

She cried out in surprise when he tugged her tube top down around her waist but his hands stopped when he felt the pants going too. "Is this...all one thing?" he asked, his voice low and husky.

"Yeah," she answered. It was all she could come up with at the moment. She opened her eyes and blushed in full, true-blond embarrassment when she saw him staring down at her breasts in such _reverence_. He eased her to her feet so he could touch her, and she cried out again, arching into him when he covered her left breast with his big hand, stroking his thumb over her nipple. She had always considered herself to be on the small side, but under the adoring gaze of Cruz Rodriguez, and under the white-hot heat of his touch, she had never felt so female and _beautiful_. "Oh...my..."

"Oh my _god_," he said with her. He splayed his hands over the span of her back, arching her against him. Lulu impatiently pulled at his tee shirt until he tore his hands from her and quickly yanked it off himself, then pulling her back against him, hard. She moaned when she felt the delicious friction of his bare chest, lightly dusted with swirling black hair, against her own. "Lulu," he growled, kissing her chin and down her throat, arching her further backwards. Her head lolled back as he brought his mouth down over her seashell-pink nipple, suckling and flicking his tongue over the hardened peak. She pulled his head closer as he repeated his ministrations with her with her other breast.

Lulu leaned back against the rock- because if she didn't, she was afraid that she might fall down- and concentrated on her breathing- because if she didn't, she was afraid she might die- and when she opened her eyes, she looked down to see Cruz kneeling in front of her, his chin level with her navel. There was a dark brilliance and beauty that she had never seen in his eyes before tonight, and Lulu knew that, for the first time, she was looking at the pure, untouched picture of lust. He placed a tender kiss to the soft skin of her underbelly and hooked his fingers into the hip-band of her jumpsuit. A question was in his eyes and he kissed her again, right where the thin cotton met her bare waist, dragging the garment down ever so slightly.

Lulu's head fell back as she looked back at him with wide eyes. She had never...done _that_ before. But looking down at Cruz, humbled on his knees before her, and pleading with his obsidian dark eyes, his wickedly sweet kisses, Lulu knew that she could refuse this man nothing. She lightly rested her little hands on his broad brown shoulders and gave a tiny nod and a shy smile. Answering with a slow, gentle grin of his own, he slid his hands deeper inside her pants, across her hipbones and began to pull. Lulu held her breath.

"Lulu? Lulu, are you out here?"

It was Maxie's voice and Cruz was on his feet again, shielding Lulu's body with his own.

"I don't know," they heard Georgie answer. "Are you sure Robin and Patrick said she came _this_ way?"

"Yeah, I thought so," Maxie said. "Ah well. Lulu's a Spencer. She can take care of herself."

Lulu and Cruz both breathed in relief when they heard the girls' soft footsteps retreating back to the house, and with a sigh, Cruz dragged her top back up. "They said 'she'," Lulu said, trying to steady her breathing. "They said '_she'_ came this way, not 'they'. Guess, um...I guess they didn't see you."

"I'm a big boy, Lulu, no one's checking up on me," Cruz said, reaching for his shirt. "They're only worried about a pretty teenaged girl out alone on the beach at night." He sighed and stroked a hand over her hair. "And they should be. It's late, Little Spencer, you need to go back to the house."

Lulu blinked. "What about you?"

He shook his head. "I'll watch you from here."

Lulu cocked her eyebrow. "You're not coming back?"

He dragged a hand through his hair. "I'm going to walk into town. It's only about a mile. I'll take the bus back to Port Charles tonight."

"Cruz, come on, that's crazy...It's so late, and-"

"And I am _so_ not tired right now, Lulu," he laughed raggedly. "And the last thing I need to be doing right now is spending a night under the same roof as you."

Lulu crossed her arms over her chest. "So this is how it's going to be, huh? Another couple of months until I talk to you again...Only this time you got to second base, so it's probably going to be even longer-"

"Lulu, _stop_ it,"Cruz said, cupping his hands over her shoulders. "I just..._We_ just need to put on the brakes a little bit, and I...and I'll call you tomorrow."

"You said that before," Lulu bratted. If he was going to treat her like a child, she could damn well act like one.

"I know I said that before," he sighed and rubbed a hand over his face. "And I lied. And I was a jerk and a coward and...And when you say 'second base', I just feel like a dirty old man."

Lulu's mouth had been set in a firm, tight line, but she couldn't help the corners twitching up.

Cruz pressed his luck further. "I swear, Lulu. I'll call you tomorrow."

"That's what you said before," she said, but she was smiling now.

"That's fair," he nodded. He knew that her trust wasn't easily won. "Are you working tomorrow night?"

"Day after," she said.

"Okay," he nodded. "I'll pick you up then, and we'll try to work on your mother's case."

She looked at him, probably judging whether or not to believe him.

"Swear on my father, Lulu," he said and her eyes softened. She knew he meant it.

"Okay," she said, and turned in the direction of the house, but he put a hand on her wrist to stop her.

"Wait," he said. "Come here." And he pulled her to him and kissed her one more time. Lulu could feel his caution- just enough to tease her, not enough to lose control, but still his kiss was soft and sweet. And when he pulled back he was smiling at her. "See you later, Little Spencer."

She grinned and started to walk away, but he called out to her again, when she was just out of his reach. "One other thing, Lulu." She turned and looked at him. He had a devilish glint in his eye. "Please, don't ever wear that thing around me again in public." She raised her eyebrows and he laughed. "I just don't know if I'll be able to take responsibility for my actions if you do." Then she laughed with him, her blue eyes sparkling and after one more good, long look at her he nodded towards the house and watched her walk away until he saw the side door of the beach house open and close.

Cruz headed for the road, glad that he was at least wearing flip-flops and had his wallet in his back pocket. A nice, late-night walk was poor company after the pleasure of Lulu's lithe young body and sweet, soft kisses, but he had to calm himself down. He'd almost lost all reason and control and for the sake of his sanity, the sake of his head (if Lucky ever found out), and most especially for her own sake, he couldn't let it happen again.

But even so, there was no way he'd miss picking her up from Carmen's in two night's time. Just as Cruz was sure that everything he felt for her- admiration, affection, desire- was wrong, he knew, without a doubt that he could refuse Lulu Spencer nothing.

_music used in this section: Ordinary Boy (Adam Pascal) & Sway (The Perishers)_


	9. Chapter 9

bWord Count:/b 2062

bDisclaimer:/b I own nothing.

_Although she may have a heart on fire, she don't have smoke in her eyes_

When Lulu walked out of Carmen's two nights later, she stopped short when she saw Cruz standing against his car, across the street. And then she broke into such a dazzling, heart-stopping smile, that she quite literally took his breath away.

On the one hand, he almost wanted to kick himself for her having so little faith in him. She really hadn't believed that he would be there. But on the other hand, if he could see that smile...maybe he would make it a point to surprise her (in a good way) more often.

"Didn't think you'd come, Detective," she said over her shoulder, as he opened the car door for her and she slipped inside.

"Clearly," he smiled back at her.

It was like going back in time. To that winter, to the easy banter and comradery, the comfortable laughter between the two of them. She turned shyly to him when he pulled in his own driveway. "Haven't been here in a while," she said.

"I know," he answered, getting out of the car. She followed him inside, helping him to flip on lights. It felt good for once, her being so easy and comfortable in his home. "You want some water or something-" But he was cut off by the small, soft woman in his arms and she was kissing him. Hot, eager kisses, pulling his head down to hers, and moaning against his lips. She had him backed against the kitchen counter, and it would have been so easy, to lift her onto the counter and spread her legs around him, but he pulled away, hands on her shoulders and drawing hard, heavy breaths. "God...Lulu..."

"What?" she said, breathing just as shakily as him. She reached for him again, but he held her firmly at arm's length. "Cruz, what...I thought..."

"I know, Lulu," he took a deep breath. _"I must be out of my goddamn mind."_ Exhaling slowly, he brushed a golden curl out of her eyes. "Lulu, we just...Take it easy, baby. This is all getting a little out of control." He could already see hot anger and hurt flashing in her eyes. "I'm not saying...I don't want to. But let's just...relax a little bit." He stepped away and tried to steady his hand as he reached for the stack of files he had assembled on Rick Webber's death over the past month. "This is everything I've been able to find on Webber, your mother, the Cassadines, anyone who ever knew or worked with or even met the guy."

Lulu took one of the files out of his hand, flipping through old photos, and bank records and letters that stretched back over thirty years. "I can't believe you found all this. So...all this time, you've been working on this?" He nodded.

She stopped on a picture of her mother at nineteen years old- the year she married her father. "She was beautiful, you know," Cruz said. "You look just like her."

"Yeah, everyone says that," Lulu said, shoving the photo back in the pile. "So...where do we go from here?"

"Well, the good news is, that there are definitely several other people who could have killed Rick Webber," Cruz said, leaning back against the counter and folding his arms.

"And the bad news?"

"There are..._several_ other people," Cruz sighed. "I dug a lot of skeletons out of his closet- there were _a lot_ of people who didn't like the guy." He looked down for a moment, taking a deep breath before raising his eyes to meet hers again. "It's a long list. With _a lot_ of people you know."

Lulu had thought of all that before. She sat down at his dining table. "I'm listening."

"Well," he rubbed a hand over his face. "There's your father for one, and also your grandmother."

"No," she shook her head angrily. "Not my dad. He would never let my mom take the fall. And god, my grandma!"

"I know that, Lulu," Cruz said. "But you've got to look at this like a cop. Impersonally. And that means considering everyone."

Lulu sighed. "Who else?"

"Alan and Monica Quartermaine were on the list, but both had alibis," Cruz continued. "Monica was in surgery, Alan was at a conference, with over a thousand witnesses. Then there's Alan Quartermaine, Jr., the son. He had motive, he was something of a loose canon."

"He's dead," Lulu said, flatly.

"I know," Cruz replied. "That doesn't mean he's off the list. Scott Baldwin-"

"No, he doesn't make sense either," Lulu sighed. "He was crazy in love with my mother. God- everyone who knew her...No one would do that to her. Everyone loved her." She shoved the file away from her. "It doesn't make any sense. Why would anyone do this?"

Cruz crossed and stood in front of her, gently stroking her hair. "Well...That brings us back to the Cassadines. And...God knows, there can be a whole book about them."

"There is. Several."

"Well, let's get started." Cruz took his cue from her to get right down to business. He pulled the thickest file from the bottom of the stack. The Cassadine file. It was over six inches thick, and most of the stuff he had found, Cruz didn't even know if it was myth or fact. "The Cassadines have a long history with your parents. Legend says that Helena Cassadine cursed them on their wedding day. A couple of years later, your mother was kidnapped and kept prisoner on their island in Greece, where she had your brother Nikolas."

"All very common knowledge," Lulu said.

"Well, this is very uncommon," Cruz said, taking a deep breath. He drew a photo out of the file, of a young man lounging on a shoreline in what looked like a Southern European city. "That's a certain M. Cassadine on August 19, 2002 in St. Tropez." He pulled more pictures out of the pile. "And on August 20, in Miami. And August 22, in London. And August 23, in Moscow. And August 25-"

"The day of Rick Webber's murder," Lulu broke in, suddenly very interested. "Well...Supposedly."

"Exactly," Cruz answered. "August 25...in upstate New York."

Lulu took the photo. It was fairly non-descript. "Wait, a second, Cruz, this doesn't make any sense. _If_ Mikkos Cassadine was alive now, he'd be over eighty. This guy looks like he's in his late twenties."

Cruz sighed. He had been over this with himself several _thousand_ times. He pulled another photograph out of the pile, an old black and white portrait of a stately prince regally glaring at the camera. "Mikkos Cassadine, 1952." Lulu gasped as she took the picture in her hand. It was almost an exact match, the same eerie eyes that seemed to peer right through her off the photo, the same air of regal arrogance. Lulu peered a little closer and almost recognized a bit of her brother in the tight lines of his mouth. She shuddered.

"Cruz, I mean...My dad always accused the Cassadines of being vampires, but you don't really think...I mean, couldn't it just be a lookalike?"

Cruz shrugged. "It could. What stuck out to me was the scar. See, right there, over his left cheekbone? Trust me, Lulu I have stared at these photos until my eyes crossed, and just...the similarities, I mean," Cruz swallowed hard. It had been a difficult month to begin with, putting Boudreauz away, struggling with whatever he was feeling for Lulu (and trying to stay away from her), and his senses were shot raw. And he hadn't been able to shake the feeling he'd had since the winter, that he was being watched. And Lord help him, he almost felt as if he was starting to hallucinate some of these things. He had become increasingly obsessed with this case. The deeper he dug, the more questions arose, and all leads seemed to lead back to the Cassadines, with never any real answers.

Lulu let out a deep whoosh of breath. "So...do _you_ think he's a vampire?"

Cruz laughed. "I don't know about that, Little Spencer, but did you know that supposedly Vlad the Impaler was a Cassadine cousin?"

"Vlad the what?" Lulu raised an eyebrow.

"The guy who was supposedly _Dracula_?" He answered and then laughed at her wide-eyed stare. Cruz swallowed again. He had been putting this off. "You know...It would help a lot to ask your brother about some of this stuff. See if he knows anything about another Mikkos Cassadine- a young one, one who looked _exactly_ like his grandfather."

"No," Lulu was already shaking her head. "We're not telling Nikolas. He'll tell Lucky."

"And what's wrong with that?" Cruz said. "We kept this secret before AJ was born, so that he wouldn't worry while Elizabeth was pregnant, but she's fine now. Why do we have to keep secrets?"

Lulu swallowed and looked down. Answering him had been instinctual, and she didn't really know why it was so important that Lucky didn't know. Nikolas either, but Lucky especially. He'd be furious for one thing, but it was more than that. Lulu looked back up at Cruz, expectantly waiting an answer. Did he mean telling Lucky _everything_? Not just everything they had found while looking through Rick Webber's past, but all of the time they had spent together over the winter, the...friendship...or whatever it was that they had built. Not to mention- God, that kiss, the night AJ was born, and that night on the beach at Montauk.

"Slow down, Little Spencer, I can see that mind of yours going a mile a minute," Cruz put his hand to her cheek and Lulu hadn't realized that she had flushed completely pink. She held his hand on her face. Her heart was pounding and his hand felt so nice and steady. "Look, I don't see what could be so bad about telling your brother. I mean, the sooner we find out who really killed Rick Webber-"

"What, the sooner you can just shove me out of your life?" Lulu stood, her voice raising shrilly, and she heard a cry building up in her throat.

"God, Lulu," he stood with her and tried to follow her, but she was already pacing this way and that around the room.

"No, I get it," she said, and Cruz almost felt like she wasn't even talking to him. "Lucky is obviously better at this than I am, and if you can get Lucky to help you, you won't need to deal with me any more..."

"_Lulu_," He grabbed her shoulders to make her stop pacing and actually look at him. "What's wrong with you?" She blinked and he could see the tears welling in her eyes. God, he knew how hard it was for her to cry in front of people, and he hoped like hell that she was too damn proud to cry over a loser like him. He breathed a sigh of relief as she stiffened her upper lip, calming her breathing. "What's wrong with you?" he said again, softly. "I want to tell Lucky, because...Because he's my partner, and it's not right that I keep things like this from him."

Lulu swiped at imaginary tears on her cheeks. "This is _my_ case. My mother told _me_ that she believed she was innocent. It's _my_ responsibility to find out what really happened."

"Lulu," His hands moved from her shoulders to cradle her face. "I have to tell Lucky what's happening. He loves his mother just as much as you do."

Lulu closed her eyes. "It's not just-"

"I know it's not just about that," he said, leaning his forehead against hers, and god, it felt so comfortable, so goddamn familiar. "Lulu, I...I care about you. I don't like just sneaking around-"

For the second time that day she interrupted him by kissing him. And nibbling on his lower lip. And trailing her fingers over the back of his neck, curling into his shirt. She moaned softly against his mouth, and he knew he was lost. Cruz backed her up against the couch, and laid her beneath him. God, she was infuriating, and he just could not get enough of her.

_music used in this section: Smoke In Her Eyes (Ty England)_


	10. Chapter 10

**Word Count:** 1274

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

_I think it's getting to the point that is the hardest part..._

Spring passed seamlessly into summer and Cruz spent his days at work, one Sonny Corinthos headache after another. He spent his nights making out with Lulu Spencer like he was in high school.

He felt like a teenager, trying to sneak around his curfew with his mother. Except now, his mother was a big brother built like a barge, and he wasn't worried about getting grounded, he was worried about getting broken in two. And Cruz knew that with each passing day, he deserved the beating coming to him more and more. Because with each passing day, Cruz grew more and more addicted to Lulu.

His days were working like clockwork. Things at the station had slowed down considerably since Boudreauz's bust- it seemed that even Port Charles' criminal element was relaxing in the summer heat. Many afternoons, Cruz ended up playing gin-rummy with Martinez and Fraser. He spent a lot of time working out- at least the gym was air conditioned and if he spent the hours waiting for Lulu to get out of work at home, he would end up thinking about her and driving himself crazy. Every night, he picked her up at the end of her shift from Carmen's. He came to realize, some time in mid June that the Santinis were the only people who ever _really_ saw him and Lulu together.

And Cruz had to admit- for two sweet little old people, they were a lot of fun. He enjoyed Mrs. Santini's motherly clucking and Mr. Santini's dirty jokes in broken English. But as the night wound down, as Cruz watched Lulu smile and move around the room, looking back at him and winking every so often, it was like he had a stop watch inside him counting down. She was always shy in the car, and he was the perfect gentleman.

But once they got inside his house, once the door clicked shut, Cruz wasted no time scooping her up into his arms. She kissed him senseless- almost. He was always so very careful, no matter how swept away she got, he kept himself in check. Nothing beyond kissing, nothing beyond holding her tight. No matter how hard it was to drag himself away from her, he never let them go any further. He felt like he was making excuses- as long as he didn't cross that line, he could stomach seeing Lucky every day. Barely.

They worked on Laura's case, each night unraveling more secrets and discovering new twists in the mystery. They were getting _somewhere_, though he wasn't exactly sure where. One night they fell asleep on his couch together, her nestled into the crook of his shoulder. Cruz gently wrapped his arms around her, and tilted his head to just watch her sleep. She held onto him so tight, and god, she looked so innocent. Her eyelashes curled against her cheekbones and her lips parted in a slight pout. He thought back to that New Year's Eve, seeing her up on stage at the Oasis, curvy and luscious and absolutely terrified. How far they had come, getting from there to here. Back then, he hadn't been able to breathe or move when he saw her there. Now, in a heartbeat, he would kill (or die) to protect her

It was past three am, and god it would be so easy to just lay there, all night with her snuggled into his chest- or carry her into his bedroom, for that matter. But with a sigh, he nudged her awake. When she whimpered and mewed against him, he sucked in a deep breath, and almost caved and just let himself fall back asleep, but that was a slope just a tad too slippery. "Come on, baby, time to go home," he whispered.

And every morning, when Cruz got up to go to work (usually after far too little sleep), his heart twisted just a little bit more when he saw Lucky.

Lulu had never found much comfort in routines, particularly since nothing in her life ever really stayed the same, when it was going good, but there was a warmth in her heart near the end of every shift at Carmen's because after a time, she grew to realize that Cruz was going to be there, was always going to be there. Lulu knew he was a creature of habit ("Everyone is in their old age," he had joked), and he liked to keep himself on a tight schedule. She knew that usually he left work at about seven, and then would play basketball or work out until nine-thirty, and then shower at the gym, and go to Carmen's. He got an iced cappuccino and waited for her shift to end.

She was still getting butterflies when she saw him. God, if he kept working out so often, she was going to have to start beating off other girls with a stick. As it was, she could barely contain herself from the time she took off her apron and told the Santinis good night until they would finally get inside his house. They would work on her mother's case, always with a heavy dose of making out, and Lulu would fall asleep at night (after he dropped her off, always with a _long_ kiss good night), her lips still burning from his kisses.

He never went any further, he never put his big warm hands on her bare skin the way he had up in Montauk. It was frustrating, but Lulu also wondered...if he knew. When she was kissing him, she just wanted the entire world to go away and melt into him. She didn't know where she ended and he began, and god, that was terrifying. As much as she wanted to kiss him forever and see how far their sweet, hot passion could carry them, a tiny part of her was just a tiny bit afraid of being that close to someone again.

Her one night with Dillon had been sweet, but brief and almost unemotional on his part. And on the hard wooden floor of a dusty boathouse. Not exactly the way she had imagined it when she was sneaking grocery store romance novels from her grandma in middle school. And when it was over, she had felt different, but not in the monumental way she had thought she would. She didn't feel like a 'woman'. She felt like a stupid little girl who had thrown herself at a boy who didn't really want her.

But she _knew_ that Cruz wanted her. It was clear in the way he held her, so tight, like he was trying to pull her right inside of him. It was clear in the low growl in the back of his throat when he would break away from her, and lean his forehead against hers. His eyes, god, his eyes were such a deep, fathomless black. And for whatever reason, for her sake, or for his, or maybe for the both of them, he didn't ever do anything more than kiss her. And the power, the intensity of that barely restrained passion she could feel humming just below his fingertips, in the electricity of his kiss, in the flash in his eyes...was perhaps what thrilled her the most.

Lulu didn't know how it happened, but somehow, Cruz was becoming more than just her friend (or her make-out partner for that matter). He was becoming the most solid thing in her life, the most solid thing she had had in a long time. And that...was the most terrifying thing of all.

_music used in this section: This Go On Forever (Snow Patrol), I Bruise Easily (Natasha Bedingfield) & Call And Answer (Barenaked Ladies)_


	11. Chapter 11

**Word Count:** 2359

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

_Can I tell you how easy it is to be with you?_

It had been far too long since there had been a real 'Spencer' family dinner. When her mom was around, she had insisted on it every week, but now...

Lulu shook those thoughts out of her head as she helped her Aunt Bobbie clean up the table. Elizabeth had organized a real party for the family, inviting not only herself, and Emily, Nikolas and Spencer, but Bobbie and Lucas, Grandma Lesley, and her own grandmother. Lulu noted that the only person missing was Luke...but that was hardly anything new.

Lulu marveled at Elizabeth sometimes. She worked hard and she took care of her kids and she loved her husband to the very core and never once did Lulu ever see her miss a step. She was a lot like Laura that way- and her and Lucky had built a very strong and solid marriage and family. Lulu admired them for that. They really had been through so much. Lulu could remember little bits and pieces from the time they thought her brother was dead, it was awful on everyone, but Elizabeth always made it a point to come and see her and her mother, and make sure that they were okay.

When they finally all sat down at the table, Cameron on Lulu's right and Lucas on her left, Nikolas was the one to finally bring it up. "So, Lulu," he began, spooning up mashed potatoes for Spencer. "Are you getting excited for your first Nurses Ball?"

It was all anyone in town had been able to talk about for weeks. Robin Scorpio had doggedly hounded sponsors, hospital board members and anyone else who would listen to get the Nurses Ball re-instated. Now, it was to be held July 20, for the first time in six years, and it felt almost as if every adult in town was getting ready for the prom.

Lulu took a deep breath. She had been putting it off. "Oh...I don't think I'm going to go."

The clatter of forks on plates, the lazy side discussions all stopped at the same time, as everyone turned to look at Lulu. This was what she had been avoiding. She cleared her throat and looked down at her plate. "What? It's not a big deal."

"Lulu!" Emily said. "What are you talking about? It's the first Nurses Ball in six years, the entire town is going to be there-"

"Actually, we're not going either," Elizabeth said, with a half-apologetic smile.

"_What_ is this family coming to?" Lucas threw his hands up.

"Well," Lucky shrugged. "Anyone we could get to baby sit, I'm sure would rather be at the Ball-"

"Norma can take care of the kids," Nikolas interrupted.

Elizabeth sighed. "Nikolas, we can't ask your nanny to take on an energetic five-year-old and an infant in addition to Spencer. Besides," she tenderly looked down at her baby girl. "My maternity leave is almost up, and Lucky's been working crazy hours- it's going to be a good night for us as a family."

"Are you sure, dear?" Audrey asked. "I don't mind-"

"Gram," Elizabeth would not be swayed. "You're the Director of Nursing, you _have_ to be there. There's going to be plenty of other opportunities, I _know_ Robin won't let the ball be abandoned again."

"Well, if you say so, dear," Audrey answered.

"Now back to you, Miss," Bobbie turned to her niece again. "Why aren't you going?"

"I...I don't feel like it," Lulu said. Nobody believed her.

"_Lesley Lu_," her grandmother warned her, and Lulu knew better than to try and fib when her grandmother was in that tone of voice. She had heard it too many times growing up.

"Well..." Lulu fumbled. "I mean...the tickets are two hundred-fifty dollars, and-"

"Lulu, _please_ do not say you're staying away because of the price," Nikolas intoned.

"Nikolas, please," Lulu said, holding her hand up against her brother's protests. "I know it's not even a drop in the bucket for you, but it's not really something I can just throw away."

"Throw away?" Bobbie looked at Lulu. "Sweetie, when you were little, you used to love to watch me and your mother get ready. We always said that when you were sixteen, you could come, and well, your sixteenth birthday has come and gone, and...Honey, I'm not going to let you miss out on this. I'll buy your ticket."

"Aunt Bobbie, it's too much," Lulu protested.

"Seriously, Bobbie, just let me-" Nikolas continued, and Lulu nearly wanted to crawl under the table. Her brother just didn't get it.

"Nikolas," Lesley said, in the same tone of voice that she had called to her granddaughter. The voice that brooked no argument. She exchanged a look with Bobbie, who nodded, and then looked back to Lulu. "Sweetheart, this is a family tradition, and what your mother would want. We'll take care of it, your Aunt Bobbie and I. Consider it your birthday present."

"Grandma," Lulu started, looking back and forth from her aunt to her grandmother, the painfully kind faces around the table. This was humiliating. But...She had always wanted to go, since she was a little girl. "Thank you. Thank you, Aunt Bobbie." She smiled, and blinked back a tear or two.

Now she only needed to find something to wear.

Cruz watched Lulu practically bubble over with excitement talking about the upcoming Nurses Ball. Her eyes were sparkling, she was _gigglin_g, and she just looked so..._girly_. He had never seen her like this. It was cute.

She was curled up on his couch, and he was seated on the other side. He never sat close to her when they were working. She would just end up tangled in his arms and they would never get anything done. "So, what about you, Detective?"

"What about me, Little Spencer?" he leaned back against his side of the sofa and grinned at her.

"Are _you_ going to the Nurses Ball?"

He rolled his eyes. "Monkey suits? No thanks, baby, I'm just happy to have the night off."

She rolled her eyes right back at him. "Cruz, you have _no_ idea what you're missing. The Nurses Ball is-"

"I thought you said you'd never gone before," he interrupted, a teasing glint in his eyes.

She sighed. "I haven't. My...My mom said I could go when I was sixteen, but then they stopped holding it, but Robin Scorpio has fought tooth and nail to get it resurrected."

He looked at her carefully. Sometimes she looked like she was going to lose it when she mentioned her mother, but now she looked okay. "So, it's like...dinner theater?"

She laughed. "No, it's not like that! It's...Yeah, it's sort of like a high school talent show on some grand scale, I guess, but...It's a really big deal in town. I'm excited."

He smiled at her, stroking a hand down her soft cheek. "Good. You'll have fun...Are _you_ going to be doing anything?"

She ducked her head, smiling bashfully. "Yeah, it's...It's just this stupid dance with Maxie and Georgie. Maxie's totally in charge."

"Dancing!" He grinned. He pulled her back into his arms. It was clear that they weren't going to be getting much more work done, and he was tired of not touching her. "I didn't know you could dance, Little Spencer."

She blushed, leaning back against his chest. "I...I can't, not really, I haven't danced since I was little, but they just talked me into it. What the hell, it's all for a good cause, right?"

He laughed and cupped her face. "Well, now I'm a little sad, I'm not going to get to see that."

"Aw, heartbreaking," she grinned at him, placing a small kiss on his jaw. "Anything I can do to take your mind off your pain?"

His eyebrows shot up. She was getting more comfortable with him, but still every once in a while, her boldness surprised him- and god, was it a turn on. "I'm sure you'll think of something, sweetheart," he whispered before sucking her earlobe between his teeth.

"I'm sorry, Elizabeth, I shouldn't have come, I know you have way too much to do today, I'm just going to go-"

"Lulu, _stop_," Elizabeth said, rubbing AJ's back over her shoulder. "Slow down, stop rambling, just sit down."

Lulu took a deep breath and stepped inside Elizabeth's apartment. The ball was two days away, and as usual, Lulu had left everything until the very last second. She had hoped that she would make enough in tips to buy a new dress before the ball, but she couldn't even scrape the sales rack at Wyndham's with what she was making at Carmen's. Her next option was to ask Elizabeth to help her alter her prom dress- she had lost a little weight over the summer from always running around at work, but the black strapless cocktail dress looked very plain and ordinary when she finally took it out of the garment bag at Elizabeth's. Plus, AJ was crying, Cameron was running around the room pretending to be a superhero, and Lulu knew that Elizabeth had _far_ more important things to do that night than help her fix her dress.

Elizabeth had AJ calmed down even before she could really start fussing. She popped her baby into her chair and gave her a pacifier, before sitting down next to Lulu on her bed. "Lulu," Elizabeth said very calmly. "This dress..."

"I know, it's terrible," Lulu said, shoving it roughly back into the garment bag.

"No, actually it's pretty," Elizabeth said, fingering the black linen carefully. "But...you can't wear it. The Nurses Ball is all about hope, and it's been a dress code since it's inception- no black gowns."

Lulu threw up her hands. "But this is all I have! That's it- I'm not going. It was a stupid idea, anyway."

"Lulu!" Elizabeth put her hands over her sister-in-law's. "You're going, and that's that. And you're going to look beautiful, and you're going to have a great time. Now stop acting like a baby, and let's find you something to wear." Elizabeth stood and pushed aside jeans and dresspants in her closet, to get to her own evening gowns. She didn't have as many as Emily, but Elizabeth had always been handy with taking something simple and making it look glamorous.

"You sure you don't mind?" Lulu asked.

"Of course not!" Elizabeth stepped aside, so Lulu could paw through her closet herself. "Carte blanche. Anything you want." She paused. "You know...Nikolas _would_ have bought you a new dress, if you asked him."

Lulu paused. "I can't ask him."

"I know."

Lulu continued to look. There was something gorgeous in dark green chiffon, but that color was awful for her, and a beautiful red strapless, but Lulu felt like she couldn't pull off its regal elegance the way her sister-in-law did. She pushed back a few more hangers and her eyes fell on a floor-length white halter dress, form-fitting and all in lace. It was the most beautiful, feminine-looking gown Lulu had ever seen. "Oh, Elizabeth, this is _gorgeous_...It looks just my size, too...Oh Liz, this almost looks like a wedding dress..."

Lulu realized that Elizabeth was being very quiet, and she looked up at her sister-in-law, who had a wistful look on her face. "It...It _is_ a wedding dress, Lulu. I...I wore it when I married Ric. The second time around."

Lulu looked down at the white lace she had been hugging to her body, and started to hang it back up. She didn't know what to say to that. "Um...I'm sorry Liz..."

"No, it's okay," Elizabeth stopped Lulu, holding the dress up between them. "I loved Ric...I did, so much, with all of my heart...But that's not where my heart is any more. I love your brother, I always have, and God I always will, and he, and Cam and AJ...That's what my life is all about now." Elizabeth held the dress in front of Lulu, measuring with her seamstress' eye. "And this...is a _gorgeous_ dress that I want you to wear at your first Nurses Ball."

Lulu looked Elizabeth square in the eye. "Are you sure?"

Elizabeth smiled widely, with no trace of sadness this time. "Yes, I'm sure. And why don't you come over before the ball, too, I can help you with your hair and make up?"

Lulu squealed. Elizabeth was great with that stuff- there was a reason that Emily asked Elizabeth to be her beautician on her wedding day, when she could have hired anyone from New York City. "Lizziebeth, you are the best big sister ever!"

The day was winding down, and Cruz scrawled his name on his very last piece of paperwork for the day. He was happy to go home, and just relax with a beer. The whole town would be at the ball tonight, and he had to admit, he did feel a little left out that he wouldn't be there. Mainly, he just felt odd realizing it was going to be the first night in over a month that he wouldn't see Lulu.

He sighed. He would not lose his head over this- and he would definitely be seeing her tomorrow.

Cruz slung his sportcoat over his shoulder and switched off his computer.

"Rodriguez!" He turned when he heard the commissioner calling him.

"What's up, Mac?"

"Glad I caught you before you left," Mac said. He tapped him on the chest with a white envelope.

"What's this?" Cruz asked, opening it. When he saw the embossed lettering inside, he groaned. "Commissioner, I can't go to this-"

"Yeah, well, consider it a favor I'll owe you," Mac sighed. "You're the only guy not working tonight who's not going to be there, and my niece will kill me if I don't have a full table from the PCPD."

Cruz sighed. One did _not_ argue with the commissioner.

Looked like he wouldn't be missing Lulu tonight after all.

_music used in this section: Brothers & Sisters (Coldplay) & Anticipation (Carly Simon)_


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note: **Just wanted to quickly thank everyone who has been faithfully reviewing! This story is my baby, and I'm really enjoying myself! Just to shamelessly pimp for a moment, I run a Lulu/Cruz message board, Burning Lights, and you can find other great stories there, as well as art and discussion.

http://z8. Count: 2228

**Disclaimer:** I own nothing.

_Tell me you love me, tell me you see me_

The Lady Jane Grand Ballroom at the Metro Court had never been used for a party of this magnitude before and everything was brand new. The tables, the linens, the chandelier, even the gleaming dance floor was unused. And of course the impressive stage built for the night's show- it was even larger than the old one in the Versailles room Lulu had seen pictures of when she was a little girl. All along the walls in the large reception area, there hung squares of the AIDS quilt illuminated by soft candlelight, lest anyone forget what the night was really about. A large crowd was gathered around the Stone Cates square, a proud eagle soaring over a replica of the old bridge that crossed the river. And this was where Lulu found Georgie, Maxie and Lucas.

"Hey, Little Cuz!" Lucas said, wrapping his arms around Lulu in a warm greeting. "Wow, look at you!" He stood back to admire her and Lulu blushed and smiled. She had to admit, she felt like a princess in Elizabeth's dress. And her darling sister-in-law had worked wonders- giving her face a dewy-soft glow, and she helped her blow out her hair in voluminous, soft waves, twisting the sides back so her bangs just framed her face. Then she placed miniature white gardenias in the knot at the back of her head. She had pre-shellaqued the flowers so that they wouldn't wilt over the course of the night. Elizabeth knew things like that. When Lulu walked out of Elizabeth and Lucky's bedroom, she knew she looked good because Cameron's eyes went wide and he half-whispered to his daddy, "Auntie Lu looks _pretty_."

"Thanks, Big Cuz," Lulu answered. "It's Elizabeth's dress actually." She turned to look at Maxie and Georgie. "Wow, you guys look fantastic!"

"Well, _thank you_, Miss Spencer," Georgie grinned, as she and her sister posed like supermodels.

"Our dresses are borrowed, too," Maxie said. "They're Robin's from some of the first Nurses Balls." She was wearing a pretty pink strapless tea dress. It was girly and cute. Georgie was in a short, beaded gold dress that had a little bit of a 20's feel to it.

"Can you believe we're really here?" Lucas said, gazing around, wide-eyed. When they were younger, it had seemed they would never be old enough. "And how come no one's mentioned how good _I_ look?" The girls laughed.

"Well, _I_ think you look absolutely gorgeous." They all turned to see their friend Guy- who was also Lucas's on-again, off-again boyfriend. He had helped Lulu, Georgie and Maxie choreograph their dance routine.

"Awww," Georgie said. "You guys are so cute."

"What, when we're not fighting?" Lucas teased.

"Hey kids!" Bobbie called as she crossed the room to her son and nieces. She waved her arms. "So, what do you guys think?"

"_Fabulous_ job, Ms. Spencer," Guy said. He winked at the girls. "I can't _wait_ to see what's in store for the show tonight."

"Guy, how many times have I told you to call me Bobbie?" she said, hugging him, and then she looked to the girls. "Well, don't you three look beautiful?" Bobbie leaned her head in close to the kids, and they did the same. "Now, I've talked to mac, and we agreed- you guys can have a couple of drinks tonight since we're all in limos, but just don't go crazy."

Lucas rolled his eyes. "_Thanks_, Mom." He took Guy by the hand. "Come on, you want to go look inside?" Bobbie followed the boys into the main ballroom.

Lulu looked back up at Stone's beautiful square. "Where's Robin, you guys?"

"Her and Patrick are the first number," Maxie answered. "So, they're backstage getting ready."

"And where's Mac?"

"Backstage," Georgie said. "He's introducing the MC."

"Who _is_ the MC?"

Maxie shrugged. "No clue. Mac and Robin are keeping it top secret."

"Um, guys," Maxie and Lulu turned to Georgie who was nervously smoothing her hair. She nodded her head at a tall, dark and handsome figure across the room. Pete Marquez. "I'm going to go say hi." And Georgie was off.

Maxie rolled her eyes. "Well, I guess we're the only two here without dates. I'm going to go inside, are you coming?"

"You go ahead," Lulu said. "I'm going to look around for another few minutes."

"Okay," Maxie said. "Remember, our number is on fifth, so go backstage when they announce Jax and Alexis' foxtrot."

Lulu nodded and slowly turned around, looking the room over. The reception room had cleared out considerably, as people were heading inside to their tables, and Lulu knew she should go join her family, too, but she still wanted a moment to herself.

The Quartermaines were huddled in one corner, the step-monster already in a heated debate with the senior Mr. Quartermaine. Emily and Nikolas were standing and talking with one of the hospital board members, the picture perfect young, aristocratic couple. Lulu's eyes met Ric Lansing's across the room as he did a double-take at her before turning back to his wife. Lulu's eyes continued to travel around the room, stopping to rest on the ornate double doors. Her heart stopped at what she saw. It was something she had never imagined, but now she knew she would never forget the sweet image.

Cruz Rodriguez, devastatingly handsome, in a classic black tuxedo. And his eyes were on her, taking her in, slowly, lazily. From across the room, his lips spread in a sexy, knowing smile and he winked at her. Lulu's breath hitched in her throat, and she felt her skin flush pink. Cruz began to cross the room to her.

As if seeing him there at all that night wasn't enough of a shock. Lulu had to admit that when Elizabeth was helping her get dressed, she'd had a twinge of regret that Cruz wouldn't see her when she was 'pretty', as Cameron had put it. And now she couldn't help standing a little proudly in the obvious admiration of his gaze. "Hey, Little Spencer," he said when he finally reached her. His eyes were glittering black, sparking his smile.

"Detective," she answered, smiling back.

He looked her up and down once more. From anyone else, the perusal would have been insulting, but Lulu felt shivers of excitement up and down her spine. "You look really pretty, Lulu," he said.

She gasped in mock surprise. "Pretty? _Just_ pretty?" She quickly glanced around the room. They were nearly alone. And she slowly turned for his benefit. When she faced him again, his eyes were a little heavy-lidded. "Are you sure _just_ pretty?"

He chuckled low and rolled his eyes. Laughing softly, he stroked her cheek. "Fine, you got me, Little Spencer. Not just pretty, you look...damn." He laughed at himself then, almost a little embarrassed. "_Dios me ayuda...Nunca he visto cualquier cosa tan hermoso en mi vida._"

Lulu blushed. She'd heard him speak Spanish before- sometimes when he was thinking really hard, he would sort of mumble to himself, and on the beach at Montauk, he'd been arguing some point with Officer Martinez. But this was different- this was Cruz looking into her eyes and saying something beautiful and sexy- if only she knew what it was. "What- what does that mean?"

He shrugged. "Look it up."

She laughed incredulously. "You're really not going to tell me?"

"Really not," he grinned.

She rolled her eyes. "Well, whatever it was- thank you...I think." She looked him over again. "And you, Detective, you look...like James Bond."

"_Jaime,_" he deadpanned, but his eyes still held that mischievous smile. The lights in the reception room flickered and Cruz looked around curiously. "Short circuit?" He asked, one eyebrow raised.

"I think that means the show is about to start," Lulu answered.

"Right, the show, _the show_," he nodded. "So looks like I'm going to see your big debut after all."

She groaned- she had almost forgotten that she had to dance- and now he was going to see. "You better not laugh at me afterwards."

"I can't make any promises," he teased.

"Excuse me?" They both turned at the sound of the voice to see a man holding a camera. "I'm with the newspaper, and I just wanted to get one more shot of guests before the ball. Do you mind if I take your photograph?"

Lulu glanced at Cruz. Now how would _that_ look to her brothers and everyone else she knew. "You're a police officer, right?" the man asked Cruz.

"I am," he answered. "Detective Cruz Rodriguez."

"And your name, Miss?" the man turned to Lulu.

"Um, Lulu Spencer," she answered.

"Ah, yes!" the man said, writing down their names in his notepad. "Your father used to be the mayor."

Lulu rolled her eyes. Was there _no one_ in this town who didn't know about her parents?

"Well, Detective, Miss Spencer?" The photographer lined up his camera and waited expectantly.

Lulu looked at Cruz. She felt a little silly- like she was a few years too late for the prom. But Cruz smiled and pulled her close, his hand on her hip, and Lulu sighed. Even after all this time, there was something so thrilling to just be in his arms.

"Thanks, folks," the photographer said, finishing his shot and walking away.

Cruz turned to Lulu. "You ready for this, Little Spencer?"

She raised an eyebrow. "Are _you_ Detective?"

Smiling, he offered her his arm, and escorted her into the ballroom. Lulu's eyes shown, taking it all in, the magic of this night that she had waited for since she was a little girl. He tipped his head to her, heading off in the direction of his own table, as she left for hers. Lulu was sitting with Lucas and Guy, her aunt Bobbie, her Grandma Lesley, Mrs. Hardy and her grandson.

"Lulu, you remember my grandson Steven, Elizabeth's brother, don't you?" Mrs. Hardy said to her.

"Baby Lulu, is that you?" Steven said, looking her up and down appreciatively.

"Hi, Steven," Lulu answered, smiling back, but her eyes were still following Cruz as he made his way over to the PCPD table.

"_Who_ was that, girl?" Guy whispered to her when she sat next to him, but Lulu just smiled mysteriously

"My brother's partner."

"Not our team, sweetie," Lucas chided, leaning into their conversation.

Guy sighed. "All the cute ones are straight."

They directed their attention to Mac as he took the stage. "Welcome, everyone, to the ninth and _newly_ annual Nurses Ball!" He waited for the lengthy applause to die down. "Now, I would like to extend a warm welcome to the woman who is going to be the MC tonight. The night wouldn't have been the same without her, please, a round of applause for Miss Lucy Coe!"

And the entire crowd was on their feet, as Lucy Coe entered like a returning victorious queen in an extravagant silver ballgown with a wide hooped skirt. "Thank you, thank you!" She said, twirling on the stage so that her dress could be admired. "Thank you so much, it is so _good_ to be home, back here in Port Charles, and on such a night!" The entire audience was still standing up, applauding and cheering. "Thank you so much, Port Charles!" She waved for everyone to sit down, and when they finally did, she put the microphone to her mouth and continued. "Well, here we are again. It's a new year, and a new room, but the mission is still the same. You know, thirteen years ago, for the first time I stood on the stage in the Versailles room in the old Port Charles Hotel, just trying to make a difference. And we did. Over the years, the Port Charles Nurses' Ball raised over sixteen million dollars. General Hospital opened the Stone Cates AIDS wing, giving easily affordable care to teenagers and children with HIV and AIDS. Yes, Port Charles, we have done some _excellent_ work, thanks to the generosity of your time and your wallets." She paused. "But we're still not there yet. Six years ago, someone decided that the Nurses Ball was too costly, too frivolous, too _something_, and that it wasn't worth the time or effort. Now, this year, thanks to the hard work of a lot of people, but most importantly Robin and Mac Scorpio-" The crowd erupted in loud applause again, and this time Lucy smiled proudly and joined in. "The ball is back. And it's not going _anywhere_." At this, the crowd was on its feet again, and Lucy triumphantly pumped her fist in the air.

"Now, with a new ball, there comes new traditions. After the show, Brook Lynn Ashton and the Idle Rich are performing!" Lulu cheered along with several other teenagers. Her childhood friend Brook had inherited her father's band and his rock star status. She had a hit song on the radio, rapidly rising up the charts. "_And_!" Lucy paused. "Under no circumstances, will I end up on stage in my underwear!" This was met by riotous laughter from the women and good-natured boo's from the men. "Get ready, Port Charles! This is certain to be a night to remember!"

music used in this section:Reach (Idina Menzel)


	13. Chapter 13

**Word Count: **3194

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing

_These feelings won't go away..._

Cruz cheered with the rest of the crowd. He wasn't around for the first Nurses Balls, but had heard Mac talk at length what a great cause they were, and Miss Lucy Coe certainly had a way of lighting up a room- and she wasn't tough to look at either. He glanced across the room at Lulu, but her eyes were shining, glued to the stage and the spectacle of the night. There was a guy about his own age with curly blonde hair sitting next to her- and Cruz didn't particularly care for the way he was staring down at his Little Spencer. But, he noticed, smiling to himself, that she wasn't paying him any mind. He turned his attention back to the stage.

"And so," Lucy continued. "Without further ado, I bring you our first act of the night- and the woman responsible for all you will see tonight. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for General Hospital's top young researcher, and that neurosurgeon who's inherited more than just his father's good looks. Doctors Robin Scorpio and Patrick Drake!"

The lights dimmed as the audience clapped and cheered for Robin and Patrick, and when the stagelights came back up again, Robin was perched on an old fashioned wooden park bench, dressed in a cute little red polka dot dress and her hair all done up 40's style. Soft piano music tinkled, and Robin looked wistfully off in the distance, as she began to sing._ "Things have come to a pretty pass. Our romance is growing flat, for you like this and the other, while I go for this and that. Goodness knows what the end will be, oh I don't know we're I'm at...It looks like we two will never be one. Oh, something must be done," _she finished as she looked off to where Patrick entered from the side of the stage, garbed up like a sailor. The audience went crazy, with loud catcalls from the women and hysterical laughter from the men.

Patrick himself looked like he was going to bust out laughing any second, and Robin couldn't suppress a proud smile. But she quickly pulled herself back 'in character' as Patrick's music started up and he started his own verse. _"You say 'eeeetha', I say 'aytha'. You say 'neeetha', I say 'naytha'. Eeetha, aytha! Neeetha, naytha! Let's call the whole thing off!"_

And he took her hand and began to promenade her around the stage as she answered him back, _"Oh, you like 'po-tay-to', and I like 'po-tah-to'. You like 'to-may-to', and I like 'to-mah-to'. Po-tay-to, po-tah-to! To-may-to, to-mah-to! Let's call the whole thing off!"_

And so they went on, good-naturedly calling each other out, and 'calling it off', but kept coming back to each other. Their 'choreography' was very natural, and mainly consisted of Patrick teasing Robin about her height. It was a fun routine for them and the audience, and as they brought it all home, he spun her around the stage as they finally admitted what they had been dancing around for the past four minutes: _"Oh, if we call the whole thing off, then we must part. And oh, if we ever part, then that would break my heart. For we know we need each other, so we better call the 'call it off' off. Let's call the whole thing off! Leeeeet's call the whooooole thing ooooooffff!" _He lifted her and dipped her low over his knee as they sealed the deal with a kiss.

Cruz laughed along with the rest of the audience, as they applauded. After they had bowed, Robin took the microphone and quickly but graciously thanked everyone for being there that night and making the ball possible again. More acts followed, and Cruz found himself enjoying himself in spite of his protests at going earlier in the night. Mac did a stand-up routine, poking fun at himself and the police force, and including many inside jokes about the criminal element of Port Charles, Skye Quartermaine Alcazar performed a surprisingly sultry rendition of _At Last_, and many of other Port Charles' citizens that Cruz Rodriguez never would have picture performing in any capacity in a million years were up on stage, singing and dancing and generally having a wonderful time. And in between acts, Miss Lucy Coe would sweep onto the stage in a new dress, one more outrageous than the next.

About an hour into the show, she slunk out in something that looked like purple liquid glitter and it clung to every curve. "Are you folks enjoying the show?" she called out, to which the audience enthusiastically responded. "Fantastic! Well, we're actually going to switch gears for a little bit. Every year, we have been honored with a different key note speaker, to just bring our cause home and remind us what we're fighting for tonight, which is a _cure _for HIV and AIDS. We've had many eloquent guests over the years, but on this night, we decided to bring it back a little closer to home. The man you are about to see is one of the most respected doctors in the country, he's a pillar in the community, and he has headed up the General Hospital Stone Cates AIDS wing since it has opened eleven years ago. Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome Dr. Alan Quartermaine."

For the umpteenth time that night, the audience was on its feet as they honored one of their own. Dr. Quartermaine took the stage with a dignified but warm smile. "Good evening everybody. It's wonderful to be here tonight- it's been too long since we've all met under such extraordinary circumstances. I'm sure you've all seen the AIDS quilt patches outside, and have been as moved as I am, every time I see them. Many of the patches are from people from the Stone Cates Wing, and many have been my patients. I have seen AIDS from many angles, as a doctor, and as a friend, and tonight, I'm going to talk about something else. I'm going to talk about family." He paused and looked off to the side where his own proud family sat at a front row table, smiling tenderly. "My family is famous...well...notorious in this town." He smiled at the audience's guffaws. "We've seen the best of times and worst of times, and so far, we come out on top. We fight- and that's public record. We have our ups and downs- but God knows we love each other more than anything. I look at Monica, my wife of...I don't even want to say how many years. How a woman has stuck by _me _through what we've faced together- I'll never know what I did to deserve that." Dr. Quartermaine was lost in his wife's eyes for a second, before looking back out to the crowd. "I see many families pass through the Stone Cates AIDS wing, I see so much love, and I...I know what love is. If that's not worth fighting for, I don't know what is."

There wasn't a dry eye in the house, as the audience stood and clapped for a teary-eyed Alan, who smiled and blew a kiss to his wife. Lucy joined him back on the stage, wiping tears from her own eyes. "Can't you see why he's one of my favorite ex-husbands?" She said smiling brightly. "Well, we're switching gears again folks, the eloquent Dr. Quartermaine is next up in the show. Maestro, please?" Lucy kissed Alan on the cheek, as the audience re-took their seats, and Alan faced the crowd again to the strains of bluesy organ as he began to sing.

"_That's life,"_ he began_. "That's what all the people say. You're riding high in April, shot down in May. But I know I'm gonna change that tune. When I'm back on top, back on top in June," _he casually strolled the stage and one could see a hint of the Casanova he once was. _"I say that's life," _he continued, as behind him on the stage's projection screen, pictures flashed of Port Charles residents working with the Stone Cates AIDS wing. Many of the photos were of the Quartermaines. _"And as funny as it may seem, some people get their kicks stomping on a dream. But I don't let it get me down. 'Cos this fine old world, it keeps spinning around." _He descended down the steps and made his way over to the Quartermaines, stopping and shaking the hands of friends he passed, including Robin, Bobbie, Lesley and Audrey. _"I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet, a pawn and a king," _as he reached the Quartermaines' table, he touched his hand to his father's shoulder._ "I've been up and down and over and out, and I know one thing. Each time I find myself flat on my face, I pick myself up and get back in the race," _he grinned, slapping his sister Tracy a high-five. _"That's life. And I can't deny it," _he continued making his way around the table, stroking Emily's cheek, and she smiled adoringly up at her father. _"I thought of quitting baby, but my heart just ain't gonna buy it. And if I didn't think it was worth one single try, I'd jump on a big bird and then I'd fly."_

Finally coming around to his beloved wife's side, he kissed her hand and pulled her up on stage with him as he continued_. "I've been a puppet, a pauper, a pirate, a poet, a pawn and a king. I've been up and down and over and out, and I know one thing. Each time I find myself laying flat on my face, I pick myself up and get back in the race." _He turned her around, and as they looked into each other's eyes, their love could be felt all around the room_. "That's life. That's life, and I can't deny it. Many times, I thought of cutting out, but my heart won't buy it. But if there's nothing shaking come this here July," _And with one last spin, he took her in his arms and kissed her the way a man kisses a woman only after thirty years of marriage. The audience cheered wildly, and they broke the kiss with wide grins, as happy as teenagers. _"I'm gonna roll myself up...In a big ball...And die..." _Alan spun Monica one more time, and faced her out to take her bow with him as he finished. _"My, my."_

Another standing ovation for the night, as Lucy took the stage to continue the show. "Another round of applause for Dr. Alan Quartermaine, ladies and gentlemen! And now, folks, the show must go on." Lucy kissed Alan on the cheek as he and his wife made their way back to their family.

She turned back to the crow. "Next up, we have Port Charles' own district attorney, and my own favorite billionaire...Not that I know many billionaires...Alexis Davis and Jasper Jacks!" The dynamic duo sashayed onto the stage as the opening bars of _Hey, Big Spender _were heard.

Lulu jumped up when she heard who was coming up. She had somewhat been putting it out of her mind that she would eventually have to get up on stage, but now there was no turning back. "Excuse me, that's my cue," she whispered to the table.

"I'll be watching, cutie," Steven winked at her, and Lulu did her best not to burst out laughing. All she could do was turn away before the smile really broke out full force.

Backstage, Maxie was already helping Georgie into her costume. Someone had decided- probably Guy- that they should dress very Moulin Rouge-ish, like French prostitutes from the turn of the century. Maxie was in a purple bustier and ruffly black pantaloons, Georgie was in red, and Lulu had 'lucked' out with a frilly white one-piece teddy. It was all lacy and looked like it could have been cut out from her dress. She felt fairly ridiculous but at least it had a skirt- a totally see-through skirt. And they all wore long stockings with garters and insanely high heels. "Do we really have to do this?" Lulu whined again. "And why do I have to be in the middle?"

"Lulu," Maxie sighed. "We've been over this. It's a certain look- you have long hair, we have short. Plus, your costume is different, it would look stupid if you were on the side."

Lulu took a deep breath, trying to keep herself from hyperventilating.

"Show time, girls!" Georgie said, as Jax and Alexis took their bows, darting off to the other side of the stage for her entrance.

Cruz knew what was up next. He had been fairly staring at the program all night. _Cabaret- Georgie & Maxie Jones, and Lulu Spencer. _His Little Spencer. Cabaret? Didn't that mean old-fashioned stripping? Images of Lulu up on stage at the Oasis on New Year's Eve- images that he had safely shoved away from the forefront of his conscious thought, for the sake of his sanity- flashed in his mind.

"And now, I can hardly believe I'm announcing this act- I've known them since they were little girls! Maxie Jones, Georgie Jones, and Lulu Spencer!" Cruz's eyes narrowed as the _pendejo_ Lulu had been sitting next to all night let out a loud wolf whistle.

Jazzy, Vaudeville-style music started up as the commissioner's older daughter shimmied onto the stage in some purple scrap of nothing. Loud catcalls sounded from every corner of the room, as Georgie spun out and winked at the audience in something red and sinful to match her sister. And the music swelled as Lulu entered from behind the curtains in the very center of the stage, a centerfold angel in lace and white.

_Chingado..._

"_When marimba rhythym starts to burn, bend with me, sway with me..."_

The girls smiled, happy and relaxed and having a good time. Cruz knew Lulu had been sweating performing in front of the entire town, but you would never know it to look at her now. Their routine was amateur- no formal dance training, just innocent and playful teenaged sexiness. Really, other than three hot blondes prancing across the stage, the dance was nothing special.

So why did Cruz all of a sudden have a hard-on worse than any he'd ever had in junior high?

The music was making him dizzy. _"Sway, sway, sway..."_ And he could not tear his eyes from Lulu as she 'swayed' around the stage, swaying her hips, tilting her head- _god_-_ winking _at the crowd. Cruz felt like she was looking right at him and right through him all at the same time, and he felt the strangest sense of deja vu. It was like a fantasy he had been delaying for the better part of a year, and still so torturously out of his reach.

Their number came to a close amidst riotous applause from Port Charles' young male population. Cruz rose to his feet almost without even thinking about it, and before he knew it, was drifting away from the table.

"Hey, where you going?" Fraser asked him.

Cruz mumbled something non-committal. He didn't know where he was going. All he knew was that he needed to get his hands on Lulu. There was a phrase he had been using a great deal whenever thinking of Lulu lately- 'as if his life depended on it'. He kissed her _as if his life depended on it_. He held her in his arms, so tightly, _as if his life depended on it. _He told her stupid bad jokes, anything at all to make her smile, because his world was instantly brighter when he saw that light in her eyes. And Cruz was starting to realize that his happiness, and yes, his very life depended on Lulu Spencer.

He found his way back stage, making sure to keep himself fairly out of sight. This was absolutely stupid- he had no excuse for being there, especially on the side where the women were changing in and out of their costumes. He saw Maxie and Georgie exiting one of the curtained off changing areas, and walking away in the opposite direction of him. Georgie called behind her, "Hurry up, Lulu! The show's almost over!"

Lulu. All alone. In some stupidly secluded dressing room- not even a room. And these silly little curtains- almost translucent. His heart pounding, he reached the section where he knew Lulu was. He took a deep breath and pulled back the curtain. Her back was to him, but she gasped and whirled at the sound.

God...There she was in some silky robe- and he could tell that there was nothing underneath- and she was just standing there. If she had any sense at all, she'd scream for help, she'd run for cover. Instead, she just held her hand out to him, like a beacon, and he ran the entire two steps to her, sweeping her up in his arms and crushing her mouth to his. Her feet dangled off the ground and she moaned against his mouth. "God...Cruz," she whimpered.

"_Dios," _he groaned back, sucking her earlobe in between his teeth. That melted her and he knew it.

"Cruz," she whimpered again. God, the sound of his name on her lips...

"Lulu, I want you, I want you so much," he murmured, pressing his tongue against the pulse in the base of her throat. "I...I want you. Tonight."

"What?" Cruz hadn't even realized that she had pull back until he heard her voice, and he opened his eyes to her wide, innocent stare. "Tonight? Cruz, you mean it?"

"I need you, Lulu. Please? Tonight, after the ball, let me spend the night with you," he rested his forehead against hers, her skin burned under his hands through the thin silk of her robe. He swallowed hard. "I need to have you, Lulu."

"I..." Lulu gasped a little, as she looked up into his eyes. He could almost see her heart skip a beat, but instead of answering him, she kissed him again, and in her kiss was the answer she was to shy to say- the answer he had been hoping for. God, she made him so dizzy. He pulled her against him, blindly searching for anything solid, and reaching an arm out, groped at thin air and then-

"AHHHHH! What is going on, what is- AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!"

And Cruz pulled Lulu back, robe and all, just in time for the curtain to go crashing down, and one underwear-clad Miss Lucy Coe to go sprawling out, dominoes style, on the stage where the GH nurses' chorus line had just started their kicks.

"What do we do now?" Cruz asked Lulu, where they hid just inside the shadow of the curtain, hearing the loud applause and laughter and hoots of delight at the show's grand finale.

"Run!"

_music used in this section: Let's Call The Whole Thing Off (Ella Fitzgerald & Duke Ellington), That's Life (Frank Sinatra), Sway (The Pussycat Dolls) & Sideways (Citizen Cope)_


	14. Chapter 14

**Word Count: **2797

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_A thousand other boys could never reach you, how could I have been the one?_

"Well, where were you, girl?" Guy asked when Lulu finally made it back to the table, breathless after she hastily threw on her dress backstage and added a fresh coat of lip gloss.

"Yeah, you missed Lucy's big finish," Lucas added. "So it really _does _happen every year- she must be cursed."

"Oh, I...I saw it from backstage," Lulu said, sitting down and reaching for the champagne in the center of the table. Now that her dance was over, she could relax a little- and she had to dull her senses some from her little backstage make-out session. Her heart was pounding, her head was spinning, and she kept hearing Cruz's voice growling, "I _need _to have you" over and over in her mind. To be _needed_- it was a new feeling for Lulu Spencer. And to be honest with herself, she knew she needed him, too.

"Well, I thought the show was just _awesome_," Steven Webber grinned at her.

"Um, thanks, Steven," Lulu said back, trying to suppress her giggles at Lucas rolling his eyes next to him.

They turned their attention back to the stage, as Lucy walked back out in something outrageously turquoise, with cut-outs all over. She might as well have still been in her underwear for all she was covered. She smiled sheepishly at the crowd. "Well, tradition is tradition I guess, right?" The crowd applauded her for being a good sport about it. "Now I'd like to invite you all out onto the dance floor, and please welcome Brook Lynn and the Idle Rich!"

Lulu let out a cheer as she allowed Guy and Lucas to drag her out to the dance floor.

"I can't believe that _Brook Lynn_ used to be your girlfriend!" Guy squealed.

"Hey Port Charles!" Brook called, waving to her childhood friends. "It's great to be home!" She launched into her first single, an upbeat dance number, and Lulu, Maxie, Georgie, Lucas and Guy were all out on the floor. They were proud of Brook- she was a fabulous performer. Lulu couldn't remember when she'd had so much fun. The years of distance between herself and her friends melted away in this night, this magical night that they had all been planning since they were six.

The entire city of Port Charles was dancing, Bobbie joining in with the kids, Emily dancing with her father because Nikolas was downstairs doing a final tally of the evening's profits with the rest of the hospital board. Steven Webber cut in at one point, for a fast number, and he was a surprisingly flashy and good dancer. But Lulu's eyes wandered around the room for Cruz, and she spotted him at the PCPD's table, sitting with Mac and Patrick Drake, just watching her with a lazy smile. His words from earlier in the evening echoed in her mind, and she shivered in anticipation. "Are you okay?" Steven asked her, putting his hands on her bare arms, his eyes filled with concern.

"Yeah, I'm fine," Lulu answered with a smile. She saw Cruz get up from the table and head over to the bar. "I'm actually tired, I'm going to go get a drink."

"Oh, I'll get it for you."

"No, I could use some air," Lulu said with a smile as she left him on the dance floor, grabbing her champagne glass off her table.

"Hey," Cruz said, without turning around, as she approached the bar. He turned with a sly smile.

"You look like you're having a good time."

"And you _don't_," Lulu said, mock-whining.

"I am," he said, still with that damningly sexy smile. "I'm watching you."

"Oh." She blushed and looked down, taking a sip of her champagne. Shyly she looked back up at him. Tonight was _really _going to happen. She smiled again.

He raised an eyebrow. "Who's that guy you're dancing with?"

"What guy?"

"What do you mean,_ what_ guy? Not your cousin Lucas," he said. They were standing very close together.

"Oh," Lulu said again. "Steven Webber? Elizabeth's brother?"

He rolled his eyes. "Yeah, him, I guess."

Lulu barely suppressed a giggle. "Are you _jealous?_"

He rolled his eyes again, but with a hint of a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. "Do you want me to be jealous?"

Lulu bit her lip. "I don't know...A little, I guess," she grinned.

He smiled. "You're cute," he said, reaching out a hand to tap her on the nose. "Then, no, I'm not jealous."

She let out a laugh and tipped her glass, swallowing the rest of its contents. A few errant drops of liquid remained on her lips and her small pink tongue darted out to lick them off. He touched her face again, stroking his thumb along her lip. "You better watch yourself with those bubbles, sweetheart."

"I'm fine," she said. She wasn't fine, her heart was racing and she felt light-headed- but it had nothing to do with the champagne. She looked down at the glass he was holding. "What's_ your_ poison, Detective?"

"Highball," he answered. Neither one of them realized how very close they were standing, but across the room a few people began to take notice.

"Mmm," Lulu said, leaning over his glass. "I love the smell of whiskey. It reminds me of my dad."

Cruz chuckled. "Baby, _what _am I gonna do with you?"

Lulu laughed at him and then applauded when Brook finished her song. "Okay, Port Charles, we're gonna slow it down for a bit," Brook said into the microphone. "This is one of my favorite Rolling Stones songs." Slow, romantic guitar strumming started, and Brook began to sing. _"Childhood living is easy to do..."_

Lulu sighed and leaned back against the bar. "I love this song."

Cruz put his glass down next to him. "Yeah? Does it...remind you of your father?"

Lulu laughed. "No."

He took her hand in his, smiling. "Good. Do you want to dance, Lulu?"

If he could have kept the image of that smile on her face forever he would have.

Though Lulu had never put much stock in fairy tales and waiting for her prince to come, she couldn't help the flutters in her stomach as Cruz led her out to the dance floor, as Brook sang, _"Graceless lady, you know who I am. You know I can't let you slide through my hands." _The entire room, every other person at the ball, seemed to float away as he took her left hand in his right and rested his palm around the small of her back. Lulu looked up into Cruz's eyes as he pulled her into a slow easy sway. _"Wild horses couldn't drag me away..."_

There was nothing Lulu would have traded for that moment, for that dance. The past seven months ran through her mind in a loop, and Lulu could scarcely believe that there had been a time in her life when she didn't have Cruz Rodriguez. He cradled her head on his shoulder, and she had never felt so safe. He stroked a hand down the soft skin of her back and murmured something in her ear- she couldn't quite make it out but she was sure it was in Spanish. When he brushed his lips softly over her forehead, a beautiful, wonderful realization came over Lulu.

She loved this man.

And just that fact made her giddy, happy. She always thought that love would be some grand, epic pain. If she looked at her family, that meant that someone would have to at least come back from the dead once or twice. But in Cruz's arms, she finally understood everything her parents had gone through, everything Lucky and Elizabeth and Nikolas and Emily had gone through. It was all worth it, just for moments like these.

He smiled, leaning his forehead down against hers. "What is it, baby?"

"Nothing," she answered. "I...I just...I can't wait for tonight."

His eyes widened in excitement and he pulled her closer. "Me too."

They hadn't realized that the music stopped, and they were attracting an audience. "Lulu?" They broke apart as Lulu heard the bitter, accusing voice of her stepbrother, Dillon Quartermaine. "Lulu, I think you should come with me," he said, grabbing her roughly by the elbow, and dragging her off into the hallway connecting the ballroom to the reception area.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, what do you think you're doing?" Cruz said, stepping between Lulu and Dillon. He wanted to smack the kid for his possessive stance, and when he saw Lulu's tan skin going white under his tight grip, he wrenched Dillon's hands off of her.

"This doesn't concern you, _Officer,"_ Dillon shot back at him.

"That's Detective, _kid,"_ Cruz said, through clenched teeth. He was very quiet, and Lulu could almost feel, from yards away, the coiled up tension in him.

"Um, yeah, whatever," Dillon said, turning his back on Cruz and facing Lulu again. "Lulu, can I talk to you,_ privately,"_ he grabbed her arm again, and pulled her off.

"Dillon, what the _hell!_" Lulu said, as she was dragged along.

"Leave her _alone!_" Cruz said, continuing to follow them.

"Look, Police Officer Guy," Dillon said, turning back to Cruz, his fingers still digging into Lulu's arm. "Lulu and I are family, and-"

"I _know_ her family, and you ain't it, buddy," Cruz said, throwing him off Lulu again. "Just because your mother is married to her father, doesn't make you blood."

"We're family because we have an unbreakable connection, she and I-" Dillon went off on a tirade again.

"Oh please, Dillon," Lulu had had enough. "We slept together _once_, you are not entitled to have say-so over the rest of my life."

"Lulu, it was more than just sex," Dillon said, turning back to her, and Cruz had a sickening feeling in his stomach as he put two-and-two together. "We shared something special, we created-"

"_You're _the guy?" Cruz said. He felt hot anger, a murderous rage boiling inside of him.

"Cruz, it's not-" Lulu tried to put her hand on his arm, but he was already too far out of her control.

"_You're_ the guy?" Cruz repeated, and before he knew it, he had balled up his fist, and cracking it across Dillon Quartermaine's jaw.

Dillon reeled back, Lulu gasped in shock, and Cruz pulled back his fist in pure, masculine pride- for a moment. And then his senses came back to him. He was a police officer, who had just, unprovoked, assaulted a civilian- a teenager for Christ's sake. "I...I'm, sor-"

"Damn right, you're sorry!" Tracy Quartermaine's voice boomed out behind him. Cruz turned to look, and there stood the self-proclaimed guardian of the Quartermaine family, arms crossed, looking as formidable a foe as any he had ever faced. She held out her hand to her son, "Come on, Dillon, let's see what the commissioner has to say about this."

Cruz flexed his hand, staring down at it, still breathing hard. What the hell had had happened to him?

"Cruz, are you okay?" Lulu said, reaching for his hand, and he recoiled from her concern. No, he wasn't okay, he had just lost his shit over something almost inconsequential, and lord help him, he wasn't satisfied.

"Lulu?" They turned again at the sound of the gentle voice. Emily.

_Damn, was the entire Quartermaine family going to be joining them in a minute?_

"Lulu, can I talk to you for a minute, privately?" her voice echoed Dillon's from moments earlier. With a bewildered look, Lulu followed her. Cruz leaned back against the wall in the hallway and closed his eyes, trying to soothe the rushing of blood in his ears.

"Rodriguez," he lifted his head and looked up to see Jason Morgan and Sonny Corinthos standing in front of him. And his night had gone from bad to worse.

"Lulu, what's going on?" Emily asked her gently from a quiet corner in the mostly empty reception area. Nikolas was still downstairs with the hospital board.

"I...I don't know," Lulu stammered, looking down and wringing her hands together.

"Lulu," Emily said and Lulu looked back up at her sister-in-law. "I saw you dancing with Cruz Rodriguez- the whole town did. And now he just punched out Dillon? _What_ is going on?"

"I don't know," Lulu said again. "Really, Emily...I don't know what it is." She looked the older girl in the eye, searching for advice, for anything. Emily had certainly had her own rocky road with her storybook romance– surely she must have some words of wisdom for her.

Emily looked down at her kindly. "Aw, honey. Are you...dating him...or something?"

Lulu laughed. "I don't know what to call it."

"Lulu," Emily tilted her head thoughtfully. "Don't you think it's a little...inappropriate? He's quite a bit older than you."

Lulu shook her head. "No, it's not like that, Emily...Please don't tell Nikolas."

"I can't lie to him, Lulu, that's not the way things work between us," Emily said gently, but firmly.

"No, it's not..._lying_, just...don't say anything," Lulu pleaded. If she wasn't ready to explain herself to Lucky, she certainly wasn't ready to explain herself to her prim and proper older brother.

"_Lulu,"_ Emily said, her voice growing more insistent. "Now, I _told _you, I _don't _lie to Nikolas. You tell him or I will."

Lulu swallowed a biting comment. "There's nothing to tell Emily. You saw us dancing. That's it."

"Rodriguez," Corinthos intoned again, as if he wasn't heard the first time.

Cruz sighed. "What do you want, Corinthos?"

"I think we need to talk about Lulu Spencer," he mumbled, looking anywhere but at Cruz.

"I don't think there's_ anything_ for us to talk about," Cruz replied, with a roll of his eyes. He moved to walk past them, but Morgan stuck a hand out on his chest. Cruz could feel his barely cooled temper begin to heat up again.

"But I think there is," Corinthos continued, finally looking up to meet Cruz's eyes. "You see, Luke Spencer was a good friend of mine a long time ago, and so that makes Lulu my responsibility..."

"That makes her your _nothing,"_ Cruz sneered. His fists were curled tight at his sides again. "Lulu has no place in your world, you stay away from her, Corinthos, and you keep your thugs away, too."

"Well, I...I care about, Lulu, actually," Morgan broke in, his voice emotionless. "We spent some time together last November and-"

"You...you _spent some time together,_ Morgan?" Cruz said through gritted teeth. "What does that, make you her savior or something? You don't know anything about Lulu."

Morgan blinked. "We shared something special, and-"

For the second time that night, Cruz was overcome by a blinding rage. One moment he was listening to Morgan prattle on about how special his connection to Lulu was, the next moment he was standing over a crumpled Morgan on the ground, more than pleased to see his split lip. And God help him, he was going to strangle the next guy who told him how 'special' Lulu was to them.

"What's going on out here?" Cruz turned again. Mac. Now his night had gone from worse to horrible.

"Mac, I want...Officer Rodriguez arrested for...assault. He hit...Jason," Corinthos rubbed his hand across his forehead, as if it hurt to speak.

_Detective,_ Cruz thought bitterly.

"I...I didn't see anything," Mac shrugged.

"What? Come on Mac, look at him," Corinthos started to argue, but Morgan put out a hand to stop him.

"Never mind, Sonny, let's go," Morgan said, eying Cruz warily as they left the hallway.

Cruz sighed. "Thanks, Mac."

"It's all right, Morgan doesn't have a glass jaw," Mac said, with a half-grin. But then he got serious. "But I can't ignore what happened with Dillon Quartermaine. Two witnesses, and Tracy wants to press charges."

Cruz ran a hand through his hair. "Does this mean my badge?"

Mac shook his head. "No...Not yet, anyway, but...suspended. Effective Monday." Cruz nodded."So...you want to tell me what happened?" Mac asked. Cruz looked down. "I'll take that as a 'no'," Mac continued. "But...I'm guessing it has something to do with Lulu Spencer."

Cruz looked up at him, his eyes wide. "Commissioner-"

Mac held up his hand. "Your business is your own, Rodriguez. But you need to seriously think about your actions. Remember who you are."

Cruz sighed, and tipped his head back against the wall again as Mac walked away. Who he was...was becoming a blurred line.

_music used in this section: Wild Horses (The Sundaes) & Black Balloon (The Goo Goo Dolls)_


	15. Chapter 15

**Word Count: **2485

**Disclaimer: **I own nothing.

_I never was a man, until I saw your blue eyes cry and I held your face in my hand_...

_He could see her up on stage at the Oasis, lights flashing around her, the opening power chords of "Teenage Wasteland" blaring. Her perfect, porcelain face frozen in fear. His feet were rooted to the ground, his heart pounding. He couldn't tear his eyes away._

_She began to move her hips, and he completely stopped breathing. With her back to the audience, she flipped her hair over one shoulder and her eyes met his, burning seduction. She reached a hand up to drag down the strap of her tank top, and then he heard the loud catcalls from everywhere around the room. They weren't alone. And she was going to take her clothes off...for something. For information. He couldn't let her do this, he had to protect her. They would find another way, he couldn't let her do this._

_He ran for the stage, but it only seemed to get further away, and as he watched, the stage at the Oasis melted away, and she was sinking to her knees in the sand of the beach at Montauk. Her eyes were closed in passion, her skin was bathed in moonlight. He glanced around him. The filthy disgusting men in the audience at the Oasis were still watching. They couldn't see this- it was too private, it was just for him and her. She was just for him. She was his._

_He opened his mouth to scream her name, no sound came out. He ran for her, faster, his legs were burning, and she only got further away. She was on the beach at Montauk, she was on stage at the Oasis, and the scene around her kept changing and he kept running. He couldn't run any more but he had to get to her- someone was chasing him, and if he didn't reach her, they would go after her. He dove for her, flying through the air, when the shot rang out, and he finally let out a blood-piercing scream._

_He landed on top of her with a soft thud- there was so much blood. He didn't know if it was his or hers, it was matted in her hair, discoloring it, and she was flopped over on her stomach. He turned her in his arms, brushed her hair back from his face and let out a cry of anguish as he saw the face that haunted him._

"_Melissa!" _The scream woke him out of his deep sleep, the sheets twisted around him, and damp with his own perspiration.

His heart pounded as he looked around his bedroom, taking stock of his situation. _A dream, just a dream. _After she had died, he had dreamt of her every night, though they were more like nightmares. And all year, he dreamt of Lulu Spencer nearly every night. Sweet, sweet visions of her smile and more lustful images of her luscious young body, naked and flush beneath his. But this...this was a nightmare of the highest order.

After the ball, and his fits of temper, she had returned to him, distracted and somewhat distraught, and it seemed their plans were thwarted for the night. She went home with her family and he came back to his home, alone. He poured himself a nice, stiff whiskey and tried to soothe his racing nerves. When that didn't work, he continued to drink until he fell asleep, and now he was waking up to _this._

He glanced at his alarm clock. It was nearly five am, and he'd had barely an hour of sleep. He sighed and threw the covers off himself, and headed for the shower. There was only one place he knew to go for guidance. He hadn't been there in years, but when a man was at the end of his rope, there was only one answer.

He hadn't been to church since Melissa's funeral service. His mother had insisted it every Sunday when he was a child, with confession at least once a month, but now it had been years...And there was a great deal on his soul.

He was the very first person in the chapel this Sunday, and he waited a long time in the confession booth before he heard the priest enter and say quietly, "In the name of the father, and the son, and the holy spirit," in a gentle, lyrical lilt with a trace of an accent.

Father Ruiz. Cruz sighed. When he opened his mouth to speak again, the words rolled out in his mother's language, which had always come more naturally to him when he was sad or angry or confused, _"Bendiga me que Padre, para haya pecado,"_ he paused.

"_Si, mijo?"_ Father Ruiz prompted. _"Cuando fue la ultima vez que usted confeso?"_

"It's been...a very long time, Father," Cruz continued in Spanish. "Years even, I don't even really know."

"What can I help you with today, my son?" Father Ruiz asked. "Have you come to confess, or just for guidance?"

Cruz sighed. "I...I have sinned Father."

The priest was quiet. He was listening, and Cruz knew that's what he was supposed to do- Cruz would talk, the priest would listen, but this wasn't like when he was nine years old. He wouldn't be absolved from his mistakes with five Hail Mary's and five Our Father's. "It's...It's about a woman."

He could almost hear Father Ruiz's smile through the confessional screen. "It usually is."

"She's beautiful, and smart and brave and...well...just...amazing," Cruz said. "I just...I don't know where I'm going with her."

"Do you want to marry her?"

Cruz let out a whoosh of breath. That was nothing he had even considered, and now presented with the thought, he didn't even allow it to enter his brain. He was far-enough gone already. "No, I'm...I'm not really thinking of that, Father, and she's...she's very young. I don't think she's ready for that. She's...she's _so _young, Father, there's so much she hasn't seen yet, and so much the world has in store for her...And she's so strong, but she's fragile, too, and...and I don't know if I can protect her. She's just...she's so young, Father."

"You keep saying that, son," Father Ruiz replied. "I don't mean to insult you, but is she...of the legal age?"

"Yes, yes, she is that," Cruz sighed. "Barely."

"There is no 'barely', my son, she is or she isn't, and that's the legal question...I am not here for the law, I am here for God," Father Ruiz said. "Why do you worry about protecting her? Is she in danger?"

"I don't know, Father," Cruz chuckled at himself, his own vagueness. "She's reckless. And I worry that one day, someone will take advantage of her innocence, her tenderness. And I don't want her to be hurt."

"We can't prevent all the hurt in the world, my son," Father Ruiz said. "Not even for our loved ones."

"Yes Father," Cruz replied.

"Do you...love her?"

"I..." Cruz found himself unable to speak. "I...I _need_ her. I don't want any harm to come to her, ever. I don't know what I would do if something happened to her."

"That sounds like love," Father Ruiz gently intoned.

"Does it?" Cruz asked, more to himself than to the priest. "To me it sounds selfish. When I'm with her, I lose control of myself, my emotions. I want her, and I need her, and..." He trailed off, reminding himself that he was still speaking to a priest. A tattooed priest with a rap sheet that would make the devil himself green with envy, but a priest nonetheles..

"Are you scared for her or yourself, my son?"

"I'm scared of her depending on me," Cruz admitted, and he hadn't realized it was true until he spoke the words out loud. "I...People have been hurt, because of me...I can't let anything happen to her. She needs someone her own age, someone who hasn't already made so many mistakes." Cruz sighed. He didn't deserve a Lulu Spencer. He was nobody's hero. "I'm lying to everyone I know just to spend time with her."

"I can't tell you what to do, my son," Father Ruiz said. "I can't tell you what God wants- all I can try to do is open your heart up to him, to listen to our Father's guidance."

"I...I don't see how God could want this for her," Cruz said, and he heard his own voice crack.

Father Ruiz's voice was uncertain. "None of us knows what God wants, my son. But what is important is you want what's best for her. And you just need to find the strength in you to do that, whatever it may be. There is nothing from which to absolve you."

"Yes, yes, there is, so much, Father," Cruz answered, his voice more than slightly choked.

"Well...Maybe we'll talk about that next time," Father Ruiz said_. "En el nombre del padre, el hijo, y el espiritu santo. Vaya con Dios, mijo."_

Father Ruiz exited the confessional, silently making sure the 'occupied' tab was still visible. When a grown man was crying like that young man, he was not to be disturbed.

Cruz paced in front of Carmen's for fifteen minutes and then looked through the window for another fifteen before he even walked through the door. Lulu was bustling around the room with trays, busing her tables, smiling at customers, talking to Mrs. Santini across the room. She liked to wear her hair in french braids at work to keep it out of her face, and it made her freckles stand out. She looked about twelve years old.

Mrs. Santini waved at him, and Cruz smiled back, but his insides were twisting. "Lula!" She called to her 'favorite waitress'. "The detective!"

Lulu looked up at him and smiled shyly, and his heart dropped into his gut. With a quick glance around to see that all her tables were okay for a little bit, she dropped her apron with Mrs. Santini, and walked over to where he was standing by the door. "Hey, what's up?"

"Hey...Little Spencer," he said, trying for casual, and reminding himself of why he was there. "Can you...take a break for a little while? I need to talk to you, privately."

Lulu looked back at Mrs. Santini who smiled and waved them out the door. "Sure."

Out behind Carmen's, there was a little alley. The Santinis had set up a little tomato garden back there with a patio table, and they sometimes relaxed there in the summertime, if it wasn't busy. They sat across from each other, and Lulu reached across the table for his hand. "Cruz, are you...Are you okay? You look like hell."

He sighed and dragged a hand through his hair. Yeah, he probably looked worse than hell. And she was just as pretty and fresh as a daisy, another reason that this had to be done. And it had to be done fast, before he lost any nerve he had. "This isn't working," he blurted out. "We can't...we can't see each other any more."

She blinked. "What?"

"I mean," he pulled his hand away. "What happened at the ball the other night-"

"Dillon needs to mind his own business," she said. She looked down and added, softly, "And yes, he's _the guy._" She looked back up at him. "Is that what this is about? Does...does what I did bother you?"

"God, Lulu, no," he stood up, and pushed back his hair with both of his hands. "This has nothing to do with you-"

"Cruz, I swear, if you say _it's not you, it's me_, so help me," Lulu was on her feet and coming around the table towards him. "Now what the _hell_ are you talking about? I thought...I thought things were going good."

"Things aren't _going_ anywhere," Cruz said firmly, putting his hands on her shoulders, and then taking them away. "Look, this can't _go_ anywhere. I'm too damn old for you. I'm lying to your brother, and he's the only real friend I have in this town."

"My...You need to let me worry about my brother," Lulu said, and he could see the beginnings of her temper flaring. "And you didn't feel like you were _too damn old for me_ when you had your tongue down my throat all summer!"

"Lulu, I never should have touched you," Cruz said. It wasn't an apology, but it was the truth.

She bit her lip. "What...What about my mother's case?"

"I'll keep working on it, I'll let you know how it goes," Cruz answered.

Her mouth dropped open. "You'll _let me know?_ Cruz, what the hell is wrong with you, this is _my mother's _case!"

He looked down. He should have known she wouldn't let this be easy. "Lulu..." He trailed off, at a loss for words. He looked at her, tears faltering on the tips of her sooty black lashes. That killed him. Without thinking, he reached for her, "Aw, baby, don't cry..."

"_Don't,"_ She flinched away from him. "Don't you_ dare_ baby me." She stiffened her lip and squared her jaw.

And Cruz drew his hand back. And she was right. And it was what he wanted. Burying the ache in his chest, he turned and walked away from her.

It was barely noon by the time Cruz got home, but he poured himself another whiskey anyways. He looked around his house. Materials from their investigating on Friday night- _jesus, that was two days ago_- were spread out on the coffee table. He opened the folder on top, and found a picture of Lulu and her mother, at her parent's anniversary-wedding in November. She was so happy, so damn beautiful.

He looked around, and goddamn it if every memory he had of this year wasn't filled up with her. He pictured her nosing around his kitchen, making peanut butter and jelly sandwiches when she would get tired of investigating. He looked to his left, to where she usually sat on the couch next to him, and he could almost swear he could smell that sweet peaches and cream scent of hers. He saw that the radio was still tuned to that moody chick rock station she listened to- god, for all intents and purposes, she had been his girlfriend. And he remembered her kiss- god, he would never forget the way she felt in his arms.

He took another long swallow of his whiskey and looked back down at her picture in his hand. The image blurred before his eyes, and Cruz knocked back the rest of his drink. If he was going to lose her, he didn't want to have to feel it.

_music used in this section: How To Save A Life (The Fray), Hate Me (Blue October) & Are You Sure? (Willie Nelson)_


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